I 'ATE YOU, BRITNEY...

We were thrilled to hear that Bristol Badgerline was offering to take Britney and his kids on a romantic bus journey across the US: like he was planning to do it on the money he makes: a couple of cases, a Greyhound pass and nights trying to not hear the noises coming from the motel room next door.

It turns out, though, that he's got something else in mind: he wants Brit and the babies to join him on an air-conditioned tourbus as he goes from arena to arena doing his rap shows.

Kevin, lad, do yourself a favour and get hold of an Amtrak timetable. You might be able to jump some trucks, if you're lucky.

Plug: Plan your trip, Kev, with Holiday on the Buses

music britney spears kevin federline