And the X-Factor winner is...

So, after that glittering list of judges waved around to replace Louis Walsh, who will it really be? Chris Moyles? David Gest? Mel B?

Erm... no, it's Sinitta. Apparently, and somewhat ickily, her former boyfriend Cowell has been preparing her to take the reins:

"I do feel bad because Louis is a close friend, but he is not on the show any more and that's not my fault.

"I'm the rightful new judge because I've been groomed for the job."

And, presumably, the Reynolds Girls were too busy.