Britney sets out to prove 'sarcasm lowest form of wit'; succeeds

Britney Spears has emerged from a sushi restaurant to issue a proclamation that suggests she might have had a drop or two of sake:

"It was so right and like my management totally knew what they were doing when they sent me to rehab. So right you know?.

"I just want to say that I'm just really, really shocked at like how nice our world is because it is just so nice.

"Like, oh my god. Like the other day like I was sitting there and I saw all these magazines and they said I was pregnant and like it's so true.

"Like, America, believe everything you read because like you're smart and I'm stupid."

At first, we thought she was being sarcastic and deliberately saying things that weren't true for comic effect. But then we saw the last five words, and thought "getting married in Vegas, getting it annulled, marrying Kevin Federline, getting divorced from Kevin Federline, the hair business..." - maybe she's not joking at all.