Gordon in the morning: It's a bank holiday, can you tell?

To be fair, who's putting in the effort today? Not the Bizarre team, who slap some pictures of a couple of footballers out on the tiles with Jay-Z and Beyonce. Which isn't much of a story:

And the stunning R 'n' B babe was in fine form as per usual, dressed in a classy combination of jeans, a low-cut white top and a white jacket.

Woman goes to club in jeans. I guess if Jay-Z had been let in wearing trainers, that might have been newsworthy.

Even the caption writers can't be arsed:

Definitely not on the Z-list ... Jay-Z and Beyonce

Where is Gordon while this slackness is in evidence?

He's off being a lad playing football at a charity event, something that he thinks will interest his readers so much he doesn't just provide a match report, but a video as well. Isn't that the sort of thing you should be doing on MySpace, Gordon?