Showing posts with label martine mccutcheon. Show all posts
Showing posts with label martine mccutcheon. Show all posts

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Darkness at 3AM: It was all a dream

It's sometimes said that there's nothing worse than a friend trying to tell you their dreams. Those who believe this are wrong, though. They clearly haven't come across the Daily Mirror telling you about Martine McCutcheon's dreams:

Martine McCutcheon has been spooked by a nightmare. The Ex-EastEnder said: "Tarantulas have taken over the world. They were up the walls, on the stairs and attacking me with their black and orange legs and claws."

How would this even end up in a newspaper? Did Martine wake up and call the 3AM team straight away? Was the Mirror desperately trying to get Martine to say something they could put in the paper and this was the best they could manage?

And then Hugh Cudlip woke up, and had all been a terrible dream...

Tuesday, December 10, 2002

Oh, wouldn't it be luvverly?

We normally wouldn't bother with this as apparently Heat have done it, but... About Me - - Martine McCutcheon's official site - is just priceless.

Apart from the introduction, where a cartoon version of a much, much thinner Martine appears to be miming self-fulfilment while another Martine signs autographs (or maybe deals with angry letters from people who turned up to see her in My Fair Lady on the nights when she was 'ill'), the site is a mixture of thick ego sauce with lacings of poorly written, self-loving gush:

My nicknames originated from my Mum. Doughnut is still used often within the family group, I was a sugary sweet girl who always loved a squidgy cuddle. Mum would say I was all sweet and sugary on the outside and soft and jammy on the inside. Hence, Doughnut was born.

And we'd like to apologise to people for the mangling of the syntax there...