NOT OFTEN HE GOES THERE VOLUNTARILY

Michael Jackson has discovered a new thrill - going to court, rather than being dragged there. This is all part of his long-term dispute with German-based concert promoter Marcel Avram. A deal was supposed to have been agreed back in 2003, with Superior Court arbitration for the tying of lose ends; Avram, though, has started to move back to the courts again. Jackson wants to get an injunction to stop him.

Yes, he's gone to court to stop someone going to court, because he wants the person to go to court to solve the problems in an agreement designed to save anyone having to go to court. Clear?

Of course, Jackson is meant to be coming to London this very week, surrounded by thousands of celebrities to record his famous Katrina benefit. Isn't he?

We're taking a leaf out of Noah's book, and sending up a dove to see if it can find him.

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