Noel Gallagher seems to think we want an Oasis reunion

If you were told that Noel Gallagher was issuing demands about the possibility of an Oasis reunion, you'd probably assume he was making threats - "give me a knighthood or I swear we'll do a four-night residency at the Albert Hall", that sort of thing.

Instead, it seems like he's convinced it's a thing people want and is trying to negotiate on that basis:

Tell [McCartney] if he writes our comeback single, it's on. Tell him to write an Oasis track and then we'll talk. I'll just put that out there.

Apparently having pretty much written the entire Oasis back catalogue isn't enough; Noel wants McCartney to actually write a song for Oasis instead of just doing all the groundwork.

Coming tomorrow: Gallagher says that if Ringo Starr agrees to do the clean-up, he'll take a dump on your living room carpet.