No Rock And Roll Fun

DO YOU HAVE ANY THOUGHTS AT ALL THAT MIGHT FILL UP A COUPLE OF PAGES? CAN YOU STRING A SENTENCE TOGETHER, OR EVEN HALF-STRING, SO WE CAN CON...

BUM RAP: Beyonce Knowles doesn't want to be famous for being Bootylicious any more . And she's also sworn that she'll never, ev...

BUM RAP: Beyonce Knowles doesn't want to be famous for being Bootylicious any more . And she's also sworn that she'll never, ev...

ANYONE WOULD THINK THAT - ASIDE FROM PEOPLE WHO ARE WAITING TO GET THEIR HANDS ON A SEGWAY AND WHO 'RECKON THEY KNOW JUST WHO NATHAN BAR...

PUTTING THE SPECIAL INTO AGENT: Having done a guest slot in that hotbed of Stanilavsky stricture Hollyoaks, Darius now thinks he's read...

CRUEL AND UNUSUAL: Bobby Brown to get nine days in chokey and then - and this is where Amnesty will have to get involved - he'll be un...

MY FAVOURITE SOUTH PARK : Is the one where Cartman inherits a fortune and buys a theme park - Cartmanland - which he intends to keep to him...

NOT ONLY DID SHE SCREAM, BUT SHE RAN THROUGH TWO OCTAVES ON THE WORD 'BASTARDS' ALONE: No Rock is relocating in the next couple of ...

RINGS AROUND THE WORLD: We're actually quite impressed with an email we got from Pierre, who pointed out this listing of International ...

DOES MY ARSE LOOK BIG IN THIS?: Buddyhead, which is so excellent you have to read it through a smoked glass screen, reports that Fred Durs...

YOU ARE WHAT YOU SING: There's an interesting little document cropped up listing the songs which wannabe American Idols aren't allo...

OH, COURTNEY... I AIN'T YOUR GRANDADDY: They say that all is fair/ in love and war/ and child, believe it/ but when Courtney's gran...

WHAT THE POP PAPERS SAY: For some reason, the busier we are, the earlier it seems to appear, but it'll be back to it's live at 10 pm...

THAT'LL SHOW 'EM: Can you spot what's wrong with the following paragraph? Almost three years after their breakup, Rage Again...

OH, GOOD: Carson Daly's playing-at-record-labels side project is preparing its first releases . Oh, good. If we weren't already ref...

DIYOBIT: It's all obituaries at the moment, isn't it? Wesley Willis has sucummed to myelogenous leukemia at the age of just 40 . Hi...

C&WOBIT: Country Music Hall of Fame member Floyd Tullman died on Friday from Leukemia . Shortly before he died, the 88 year-old finishe...

STROKING THE FIRE: We're now meant to be getting frottingly excited as the Strokes have named their album . It's going to be called...

NO SHIT, SHERLOCK HEADLINES OF THE WEEK: Debbie Harry says Monroe inspired her to go blonde . Coming next week: "Name was taken from a...

BIOGOBIT: Ian MacDonald, music journalist, has died . Although his work has appeared in Uncut, Mojo and the NME, where he was briefly a sta...

APPENDICITIS BITES: So, the one out of Tatu who doesn't look like a tranny Mick Hucknall has been rushed to hospital with get-me-out-of...

WHERE DO PEOPLE GET THE IDEA SHE'S LITTLE MORE THAN A TAILGATER?: The fact that she's waited until her sister broke the US before D...

LIKE THE HARD ROCK CAFE, ONLY WITHOUT THE BURGERS: The last time a Liverpool nightspot attempted to replicate beyond the city boundary, the...

THIS'LL BE A CAREER MOVE, THEN: Aspiring rap singer found shot to death

'HURRAH! NOBODY BURNED DOWN ANY TOILETS!": So, lets give credit where it's due, and give thanks that - apart from the nasty ba...

SYSTEM OF A FALL DOWN: The it-would-be-foolish-to-call-it-cursed Leeds Festival had another major fuck-up on Friday when a 'safety'...

PORTUGUESE UNCERTAIN OF WHAT CONSTITUTES TOURIST ATTRACTION: You've got to love the town of Albufeira in Portugal, wh've just named...

BUMPING AND GRINDING AFTER NIGHTFALL?: Frustratingly, the reports of Bobby Brown being arrested for violating parole is that they don'...

BORKING?: We've had an email from Carina in Australia, giving us what we imagine she'd call a good 'dissing': everyone k...

TO BE FAIR: We'd picked up the piece in Private Eye about Braham Parish Council being given tickets for the Leeds Festival, which they ...