No Rock And Roll Fun

HOFF TO REHAB AGAIN: Germany's favourite curly-headed actor-popstar David Hasselhoff has been ordered to seek an alcohol treatment prog...

UNDERGARMENTS OFFER SUPPORT: Rather like the Inspiral Carpets making more from tshirts than music, but on a grander scale, it's been su...

SO I MACED HIM AGAIN...: Fun aplenty to be had on the R kelly/Jay-Z tour. The increasingly erratic Kelly (who turned up at a McDonalds earl...

IF HE'S A GENIUS...: We understand that Danny McNamara is floating of a sea of warm feelings towards Chris Martin - Martin wrote Gravit...

STEP FORWARD HALLIWELL: Sandwiched between Sarah Michelle Gellar telling how she had to call for help in a Japanese toilet and The Killers ...

HARD TIMES AT SONY: Or maybe not - the company just posted an GBP820 million estimated profit for the year, but things really can't be ...

DID YOU THREATEN TO OVERRULE HIM?: As if their voicing of support for the Tories wasn't enough to cement Busted's position as the T...

PLANS FOR TOMORROW NIGHT?: Fancy seeing Franz Ferdinand dj and gigs by the Beatings and The Violets? Pull on a Halloweeny fancy dress (yes,...

OOH, THEY ARE DOGGED: You've got to give the RIAA some credit for determination - they've filed another 750 John Doe lawsuits agai...

DISENDORSING BUSH: Having got himself into a mess playing kidophile Gary Glitter, despite pledging four years ago that he didn't want t...

EXTRA BURGESS: If you were thinking that there was something like a hometown date missing from the Charlatans Christmas Tour, wonder no lon...

UNFORTUNATELY, THEY WEREN'T FORCED TO STAY THERE CUT OFF FROM HUMAN CONTACT FOR THREE MONTHS: Just when you think bands have run out of...

MOZZER ENDORSES KERRY: Okay, it's not totally surprising, although we're not sure how keen Morrissey can be throwing his weight beh...

DON'T WORRY, DUNC, WE'RE SURE YOU'LL BE SHOCKING: Duncan from Blue - afraid we might see him just a fairly well-filled pair of ...

DIAMONDS ARE A GIRL'S BEST FRIEND: To encourage people to trot off down to the store and buy the Britney Hits DVD, shrewd marketing typ...

MIGHT WE SUGGEST BONO DOES THE COVERED IN BLOOD ONE?: Oxfam are lining up a series of posters of stars of a Chris Martin, Bono, Stipe, Thom...

OOH, NICKY, YOU'RE SHOCKING : Nicky Wire is the latest "star" to grace the Orange Telephone Company's extended advert slo...

NO WINNERS IN BEAR V SHARK: Financial misdoings and deeds or something are being given as the reason for the pulling of the Bear Vs Shark E...

SOME GOOD NEWS IN A GRIM WEEK: According to a statement issued from his website, Marc Almond is out of intensive care after his motorbike ...

THIS IS THE NEW AGE: The first-ever equivalents of Platinum, Gold and Silver records for digital music have been handed out by the RIAA, as...

RIGHT, WHICH ONE'S THIS, THEN?: Courtney's been told she has to stand trial on the "assault with a deadly weapon" charges...

ROCK ON THE STATE: Normally, we get very nervous the moment government funding (central, European or local) comes anywhere near rock music ...

7,500: Well, reaching post number 7,500 probably indicates that I've got way, way too much time on my hands or something - or else that...

GET INTO BRITNEY'S UNDI... WHAT, WE'VE USED THAT HEADLINE BEFORE?: Huh. Well, this time, it's going on a story about various ce...

HE NEARLY TOOK NME.COM WITH HIM: The sheer weight of people seeking out everything Peelie took down nme.com this morning .

AND SISTER CAME TOO...: We wonder if Kylie actually knows that Dannii Minogue is planning for the pair of them to buy a flat together in Pa...

IF IT SOUNDS POOR, IT'S YOUR OWN FAULT: There have been a lot of grumbles from people who've lashed out their granny's life sav...

IT'S HARD TO BELIEVE THERE'S A GOD, ISN'T IT?: While everyone who cares about music is already feeling at a pretty low ebb, Rob...

TRULY, IT WAS THE PEELENIUM: There was a stock gag in 60s and 70s TV shows where a woman, usually, and elderly, always, would do something ...

BUY OUR ALBUM FOUR TIMES, REQUEST BONO: Interesting that Bono is happy to release the new U2 album in four variants - CD, CD and DVD, DVD ...