GO FOR FREE

There's generous, there's generosity, and then there are free Go-Betweens gigs. They play Avalanche Records, Edinburgh next Wednesday [12th May]. There's also a proper, paid-for tour as well:

Brighton Concorde 2 (May 9)
Liverpool Carling Academy (10)
Glasgow Renfrew Ferry (11)
Birmingham Carling Academy (13)
London Shepherds Bush Empire (14)

And, apparently, there's going to be small tribute to the band in a forthcoming episode of 24, where a knowing hat is tipped through a company called McLennan-Forster. Mind you, since all the staff are certain to end up dead/burned/working for turrists, it's probably a back-handed tipping.

The new album:

Oceans Apart, in glorious double CD version

music go-betweens 24

HE'S A SHIT DRIVER

Les McKeown has admitted smashing his car while twice the legal limit for driving - thirty years after being convicted of reckless driving in an incident which caused a woman's death.

When stopped by police he claimed he had not been driving the car and had just returned from a meeting with Rolling Stones guitarist Ronnie Wood.

So he was so pissed he seems to have not realised that the person who'd seen him crash his car and try to flag down a cab to escape had, erm, seen him crash his car rather than be meeting with Ronnie Wood. His defence claimed McKeown had "effectively panicked" - although it wasn't very effective, judging by his shit alibi. Sentencing takes place on May 12th.

In other 'musicians driving like fuckwits' news, Mindy McCready has been pulled over:

According to the police incident report, Nashville's finest pulled McCready over around 3 a.m. for a standard speeding violation after clocking her at 58 in a 40 mph zone. Corporal Candace Mowry said the arresting officer initiated a field sobriety test after smelling alcohol in the car; McCready performed poorly on the test and refused a Breathalyzer.

It's not known if she refused the brethalyzer with the words "no thanks, officer, I've got a Bacardi and coke here already." McCready admits she was speeding, but denies that she was pissed and also says that charges that she was driving on a suspended licence are also wide of the mark. She's been released on bail, but she must be worried that a guilty verdict here will lead to her sentence for possession of oxycontin being toughened up.

music bay city rollers les mckeown mindy mcready

THEY CAME BACK. NOW THEY'RE STICKING AROUND

The reunion kind of runs forever - clearly delighted with the million or so quid they made last year, The Pixies are doing a twenty-one date tour, although original plans were to do as many fifteen two-shows a night have been scaled back, so just four US cities get the double deal. But this isn't the end of Nu-Pixies: their tour agent says there are "a lot of markets left to play in the future." It sounds like the intention is to visit every single US city at some point. The good people of Wichita Falls, Texas, have already promised they'll leave the waterfall switched on overnight when they get their Pixies date.

music pixies

EVEN JAGUAR IS SNIFFY ABOUT THE MAJORS

It's lucky the RIAA doesn't have a soul or anything, otherwise it'd have to spend some time searching it to try and work out exactly why people hate it and most of the artists it's members represent. Even Jaguar - who are owned by Ford, so not entirely afraid of the faceless monolith - are so convinced the majors couldn't generate a good time given a bag of coke, Kate Moss and a bucket of goosefat - when they came to pull together a CD to reward testdrivers of their 2005 model, they had only one instruction for Jason Bentley, a Santa Monica DJ who compiled the set: "They didn't want me to use music from major labels." So instead, Jaguar 2005 features Lemon Jelly, Cut Copy, Zoot Woman and the like.

Of course, there's a certain amount of "making the brand cool" bollocks in sticking just to the indie labels, and you can probably gather flipcharts from the Jaguar dustbins to prove the point, but even so: a major corporation telling four other corporations that, by definition, their music doesn't cut it, even for people who drive pointlessly expensive cars - that's really got to hurt.

music jaguar riaa

RATDOG LOOKING FOR A FAN

Police in the US are asking fans of Ratdog to help out with a search for Patrick M Welsh; he's not been seen since April 15th, and there's some suggestion he could be following the band. They played New York the last night he was seen. It is slightly curious, though, as to why the cops are issuing an appeal to Ratdog fans rather than just popping down to their next gig with a couple of photos.

music ratdog

FOXY WON'T DEAL

Foxy Brown has refused to cut a deal with the prosecution in the case which claims she beat up on a load of nail technicians. The details in their banal glory are:

Brown had stopped by Bloomie's, a salon she frequents in the city's Chelsea district, on Aug. 29 to get her nails in shape for the MTV Video Music Awards.

She says two salon employees locked her in the salon after she refused to pay for a manicure she claims she never received.

Bloomie employees Myoung Yi and Sun Ji Song, meanwhile, say Brown's claws came out after seeing her bill. They claim the artist whacked them with her cell phone and fist, causing "bruising and swelling to the face, as well as substantial pain."

The workers called the police, who let Brown go after she showed them her receipt. But Brown was later slapped with assault, attempted assault and harassment charges.

You;d have thought Brown would have been keen to cut a deal and stop the pain of the courtcase, if only because they keep referring to her by her slightly less bling real name of Inga Marchand.

music foxy brown

FUTUREHEADS IN THE LIGHT

Sunderland is having a glorious week of it. They won the race to declare election results first (okay, that does just make them look slightly needy for publicity come to think of it: "The place where people can count quickly. Once Every Four Years" does sound like the advertising slogan for a city that doesn't have very much in the way of attractions.) And tomorrow, before their local team kicks off the last match of the season, they're getting some Futureheads action to celebrate their promoition to the next league up. (We're lost now as to what any of the leagues mean, as it seems that the Fourth Division is now pretending to be the second division).

music futureheads football sunderland

A SMALL VICTORY FOR THE WAY WE WERE

Good news for people who feel that copyright protection has got too tight: The U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia reversed a Federal Communications Commission order that would have required people making digital TV equipment to make their machines recognise a "broadcast flag" in signals that would limit what people could do with copyrighted material. The flag, in effect, would prevent viewers from making up the 21st century equivalent of tapes of their favourite bits of programmes, or lending last night's 24 to a mate who missed it, unless the copyright holder gave them explicit permission to do so. The appeals court, though, pointed out that the FCC had no powers to insist manufacturers do so, because the flag device was activated only after a signal had been communicated - in other words, after the FCC's jurisdiction had been left.

Of course, they'll just find some senator or congressman and pump cash into his pocketbook until they change the law. Apparently, it's important, to protect the American way:

On Friday, broadcasters vowed to take their fight to Congress and push for broadcast-flag legislation that "preserves the uniquely American system of free, local television," said Edward Fritts, president and CEO of the National Association of Broadcasters.

We know that ITV's regional news programmes aren't what they were, but in what way is local free to air TV "uniquely American"? And how exactly does breaking people's TV sets defend that anyway?

music tv fcc

BABYCLOTHING

We know that we should be pleased that someone is making Sonic Youth tshirts for babies, but we can't help but feeling that it's wrong: surely it's just as cruel to inflict your artrock passions on a child as it would be make them parade your love of Celine Dion?

music tshirts

WE'D STRUGGLE TO COPE WITH THE ASDA ADVERT

We know Ozzy Osbourne isn't totally connected to the world the rest of us live in, but even so: what is the international fame that he believes Sharon has achieved?. A couple of Asda adverts, a guest slot judging some sort of fifth-generation opportunity knocks and a daytime chat show so godawful the network who made it not only axed it, but spent a fortune gathering up back issues of TV Guide to destroy them so they could pretend it never happened?

Besides, why would Ozzy have trouble coming to terms with his wife being so busy? It must be sweet getting her out the house so often. It's the rest of us that have to cope with her inability to find somethins she's good at.

music tv sharon osbourne

WHERE NOBODY KNOWS YOUR NAME

Sick of being called everywhere they go, Brian McFadden and Delta Goodrem are planning to start over by relocating to New York. Friends explain it all:

Brian felt it was time for a new start where no one knows them - or their past.

It's not clear why they've chosen New York, as virtually everywhere outside of Delta Goodrem's hometown would struggle to put a name to her face, and McFadden is slipping so quickly from people's minds he has to show ID to get into his own living room. Apparently, Delta believes that her career lies ahead of her in the US. Maybe if Jessica Simpson gets her own sitcom, and the standards are low, and there's a part for an aunt that doesn't require too much talking, and every actress in America is too busy with proper work, and the producers decide not to use a glove puppet.

We're sure the Australian Tourist Board will be delighted that Delta's very publicly chosen some place else.

[Updated 23/08/08 to reflect current site style; content unchanged]

DIDDY ALMOST DOESN'T MAKE IT

Poor Puff Combs Sean Diddy Daddy - there he was, flying off to some pointless business meeting when his plane was struck by lightning. Although there was an emergency landing, nobody was hurt.

Now God has raised the stakes by taking a pop-shot at Combs, it's expected that the Catholic Church will have to take a side in the East Coast-West Coast rap wars. "It's only a matter of time before Pope Benedict does a drive-by in the Popemobile" suggested an expert.

music puff daddy

SOMETHING OF A WRITE-DOWN

In the comments section earlier this week, Robin Carmody pointed out that the BBC News had slightly over-estimated what the Number 8 entry for Coldplay meant in terms of history: the original article has now been revised a little:

Coldplay have become the first male British band to have a new entry in the US Top 10 singles chart since The Beatles.

Someone reminded them the Spice Girls entered at number five with Say You'll Be There in 1997. Which actually means that Coldplay aren't even the first UK band to score a top ten entry in the last ten years. Although 'Coldplay - not as good as the Spice Girls' is a headline which appeals.

We'll let you know if their acievement gets any further write-down.

music coldplay spice+girls

YOU CAN'T HAVE IT UP THE ARSE AT STARBUCKS

With their role as tastemakers for a nation getting ever more serious, it;s disturbing that Starbucks in the US is moving into providing censorship with your frappucinos. The chain has decided to withdraw its support for the new Bruce Spingsteen album because it mentions anal sex and using prostitutes. Starbucks' Ken Lombard tries to play down the censorship angle:

"There were a number of factors involved. It (the lyrics) was one of the factors, but not the only reason," Lombard told Reuters.

He said Starbucks' two Hear Music stores in Santa Monica and Berkeley, California were selling "Devils & Dust," even though the CD would not be stocked in coffee shops.

"While we agreed the lyrics to 'Reno' did warrant an advisory, our decision to choose another title to showcase was ultimately an issue of scheduling."

Yes, apparently the coffee shop decided that it couldn't let down, um, Antigone Rising (nope, us neither) and so there simply wasn't room for Bruce - it wasn't the buttfucking, oh no. Starbucks have nothing against that. They weren't censoring. Is that clear? They simply went to all the trouble of cutting a deal with Sony to push the CD, and then suddenly remember - whoops - that they'd already made this deal with Antigone Rising. Who don't sing about anal sex, but that's not the point.

music bruce springsteen starbucks censorship

NEVER MET A BUG LIKE YOU BEFORE

Having managed to fight back from his brain haemorrhages - two of 'em - Edwyn Collins then managed to contract MRSA while supposedly recovering, says his wife:

"Edwyn does have MRSA and has had it for a few weeks, but he has turned the corner and is now doing absolutely fine.

"He contracted it in the wound site as a result of the operation but he received treatment and has come along brilliantly. He has had further surgery to remove the infected tissue and is fighting back, just as he has done all along."

music mrsa edwyn collins

HAVANA GREAT TIME

Although, apparently, the US authorities have approved Audioslave's plans to play a gig in Havana, we're a little confused: isn't it illegal for American citizens to visit Cuba at all? Is this all some kind of trap? Anyway, it's the first time that an American band have played a gig on Cuba - so far, the influence of US rock on the island has been restricted to the stuff being blared into metal boxes over in Guantanamo.

We're sure that Audioslave won't be thrown in prison when they try to get back into the US.

music audioslave cuba

EMI SIGN UP TO SNOCAP

Continuing the frankly bizarre dual policy of trying to close down peer-to-peer networks and developing a business plan that relies on the same networks, EMI has signed a deal with Shaun Fanning's Snocap to use the 'fingerprint' technology to track potential legal, charged downloads through the networks.

"This sends a signal to music industry critics who claim we are technophobic," said EMI Music North America chairman and chief executive David Munns. "If anything, we are embracing technologies like Snocap, which allow the peer-to-peer community to share music legally."

But Mr. Munns, nobody thinks the record labels are technophobic - we simply believe that you're bloated, slow-moving and greedy and obsessed with discovering expensive solutions to try and keep prices of music artificially high rather than growing the market by junking DRM and reducing prices to a realistic level. Something the Snocap deal signals once again, if you think about it.

music p2p emi snocap

WHAT THE POP PAPERS SAY: The problem with giants are they cast enormous shadows special

Two weeks ago, it was Coldplay - Part One. "The only things I read about us are terribly abusive and the only people I meet hate us" sobbed Chris. Have you ever wondered why, Mr. Martin? Perhaps its because you say things like "it's about turning up at the NME awards and feeling you can look Paul McCartney in the eye because you work as hard as him." What - three albums in how many years? How about looking, say, a builder in the eyes? Or a nurse?

He does have a great promotional idea, though: "commercially, it would be a great idea to blow my head off with a shotgun." No, no, Chris. That would be an awful business decision. Shotguns are expensive; swimming after a heavy meal might be a better idea.

Last week, it was Coldplay - Part two. And, frankly, this was the more honest and interesting part:

"Because we step back, Chris' point of view is, therefore, our point of view. We've been happy to let it be the Chris Martin Band," says Will. About the most diplomatic, face-saving way of admitting you're back-up boys to the Hollywood Husband there is.

But the big thing last week was Oasis' world exclusive interview. They've not changed a bit, you'll be delighted to hear - still stupid, boorish and utterly irrelevant. Here's Liam, muttering proudly that "there wasn't a cut on my fucking' face" after his fight in Munich. Then here's Noel, denying Zak Starkey was drafted in because his Dad was in the Beatles: "that'd be like getting Stella McCartney to do backing vocals." Or hiring someone because they were in Heavy Stereo, presumably?

Noel then suggests that "£32.50 is nowhere near enough to come and see me play my guitar..." (ah, remember the days when Matt Johnstone would insist that "five pounds for a year of my life is a bargain"? He was wrong, too), before they start to consider their competition. "Scissor sisters? It's just music for hairdressers, isn't it?" Don't be down on the hairdressers, Noel; they might be able to help you with the looking ten years younger business. Liam has a Scissor Sisters opinion, too: "I'm more entertaining than that cunt, and I'll rip his fucking vocal chords out anyday because he's fucking rubbish." Erm... except, the only time you've ever gone head to head, at last year's Glastonbury, you were so unentertaining even Michael Eavis couldn't find anything positive in your performance.

Why, the NME asks Noel, would a 16 year old care about the return of Oasis? "Because your big brother would have fucked drummed it into your head that we meant more than any other band." Well, apart from any 16 year old with any sense saying "if you're so important, why does nobody give a fuck about you now?" and the chances that only an older brother who still lives at home in their early 20s would be in a position to have this conversation, when i was 16 I immediately distanced myself from any band my brother might have endorsed on the grounds that it was likely to be late-period Gary Numan or Iron Maiden. But Noel seems convinced that the kids love him: "All these 15, 16 year olds were saying 'Definitely Maybe changed our lives, we'd jump around with tennis rackets to rock and roll star.'" Even Noel spots the flaw in this claim: "You were fucking nine when it came out." Exactly.

And how does Liam feel about Pete Doherty? "So what does the word Libertine mean? Freedom! He's fucking in the corner with a helmet on his head... there's nothing free about that." Er, right, Liam - except Libertine doesn't mean freedom, it's a term used for someone who is dissoloute or living outside of social norms, which would seem to be absolutely spot-on for a drug-addled burglar who shags Kate Moss.

How Liam doesn't understand anything about rock and roll: "They [The Kaiser Chiefs] wear fucking make-up and their kecks are skintight. What's that about?" You start to realise exactly what it is about Oasis that is so life-crushing: the hate the scissor sister's colours, they hate the Kaiser Chiefs' attempts to put on a show; it says it all that when pressed for a band they like, Liam offers Kasabian. They have the same one note, grey, sights-no-higher than last orders and a kebab attitude; a swagger about an empty life. Like those scrapyards you see with nothing worth stealing but nevertheless with four guard dogs parading about, Oasis have always been stuck with a worldview that can't see beyond the end of the street. They haven't changed.

This week, the bands went head to head with talking about their new albums. Chris Martin talked us, track by track, through X&Y. The secret track - a move so pointless in the age of CDs and downloads (how do you do a secret download anyway?) - was originally written for Johnny Cash, who had the good sense to die before recording it. Martin says he had trouble writing from the perspective of a seventy year old man, presumably because he can't imagine having a soaraway life like that.

Oasis, meanwhile, explain the inspiration behind some of their tracks. One new song is about buying a bottle of milk; but we finally get to the bottom of why they say each album is better than Definitely Maybe - Liam thinks DM "was just alright."Something, at last, we can agree on.

Also in this week's nme: Serge Pizzorno from Kasabian talks about getting hit with a bottle in Glasgow - six stitches, but he'll have to go bald before anyone sees his scar. So, about 2009, then.

E from Eels takes on the might of Peter Robinson: apparently, they did the interview before but the tape machine had no batteries in. Who knows what we, as a world, missed out on?

Brett Anderson wants us all to go out and vote (there's still time, polls don't close until 10). If you don't vote, he warns, extremist parties like the BNP could creep into power.

Not being apathetic are Thom Yorke and Mark Thomas - they've put together a contest to try and promote awareness of the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty. Come up with a nifty new name for it, and you could win £100 and a signed CD. Plus, the vague possibility that you won't spend a nuclear winter as a bitch to a giant cockroach.

The Killers face down the Fannish Inquisition (a long running and bad name for a feature); they're a bit sniffy when someone hints they sound like Shed Seven: "if we sounded like them, they would have sold three million records and we probably would have heard of them." But you sound like you, and we bet that the drummer from Shed Seven doesn't know who you are.

reviews
albums
gorillaz - demon days - "a few IQ points away from being as clever as they think it is", 8
electrelane - axes - "fine and dandy", 8

tracks
totw - ambershades - my darling - "file next to Wake Up Boo"
juliette & the licks - got love to kill - "averagely mundane"
warren suicide - i know you - "exfoliate"

music the killers oasis coldplay

IF ONLY IT WERE TRUE

We're disappointed that Jessica Simpson is denying that she's having a thing with Fred Durst; if only because it would be nice for her to be in a relationship where she was the intellectual powerhouse for a change.

music fred durst jessica simpson

GOOD FIGURES ALL ROUND

There's not many people who'll be upset by the latest bunch of Rajar figures. Talk Sport have overtaken Virgin to become the nation's second-most listened to commercial station, but Virgin have managed to add some listeners to their audience so they're not too upset. The inexorable rise of Terry Wogan continues; he's increased the biggest audience in UK radio a little further; Radio One nudged up slightly to 9.96 million listeners overall, and 7, 6Music and 1Xtra have all shown increases - 7 has become the first digital-only network to break through the half-million listeners mark.

In the overcrowded London market, Heart, Capital and Magic continue their dainty dance, this time round with Heart edging to the top of a largely undifferentiated pile. They might be less delighted at Heart to discover that Jono Coleman, the breakfast host they canned in favour of Jamie Theakston, had delivered a 28% rise in listeners during his last period in charge of the shift.

music radio audiences

IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME

Who on Earth would be so deluded as to suggest that Melanie Blatt actually preferred Jay Kay to his bassist Stuart Zender, but got pregnant by Zender anyway as he moved in too quickly for Jamiroquai? Nobody at all. Except Jay Kay.

Coming tomorrow: "I so was in with that Britney Spears, but I stopped to tie my shoelaces and... woosh, in went Federline..."

It's not clear if Mel Blatt has ever considered the thought of having Jay Kay pumping up and down on top of her like a Jack Russell in a bouncy castle, but we think this might be her reaction:

music mel blatt jay kay

THE VERY ESSENCE OF TRYING AGAIN

Just a few short months after the last attempt collapsed like a souffle in an oven on the R101, Victoria Beckham is threatening to try and relaunch her singing career. Actually, we're not sure "relaunch" is right - surely "launch", unless you count standing in the background of Spice Girls videos as "a singing career".

The Daily Mail reckons "she wants to be famous for something other than being David Beckham's wife." As, indeed, you will be, Victoria. David Beckham's ex-wife is a very real possibility; and the way David's going being famous as his wife won't be much of an option for that much longer.

music victoria beckham david beckham

A NARROW ESCAPE

We're not surprised that Madonna has appparently told Britney she's "too busy" to be a godmother: after all, that's the reason Maddy gave for not answering when she was asked how she felt about the chap at the Kabbalah Centre she helps fund making his holocaust remarks. How can somebody without the time to make a simple statement ever hope to find the space in their schedule to help take care of a kid's spiritual wellbeing?

Of course, the kid will doubtless be delighted in a few years to discover that it almost had a cult fundraiser acting as a conduit between it and God. Presumably it would be the only such relationship where the godkid was expected to contribute to the godparent, and not vice-versa.

music kabbalah britney spears madonna

THE OSBOURNE/WILLIAMS PHONE MIX-UP. AGAIN.

We know that Sharon Osbourne has so little to offer she's got little choice but to keep telling the same anecdote about the time she supposedly phoned Robbie Williams by mistake, thinking it was Ozzy and coming on to him. Now Kelly is using the same story to try and cover up her own lack of anything to add to the gaiety of nations. Quite why The Sun thought it was worth running the anecdote so old hairy it first appeared when people still liked The Osbournes, we don't know.

music tv sharon osbourne

THIS STORY APPEARS TO BE THIRTY YEARS OUT OF DATE

In the running for the Mojo Awards this year are David Bowie, Siouxse Sioux, The Ramones, Johnny Rotten and Marc Bolan, up for the "icon" award; Paul Weller, Kate Bush and Brian Wilson are struggling with each other for the songwriter award - someone called Damien Rice is also nominated, but surely he's not been born yet?

Next year's awards are expected to show some signs of the influence of the so-called New Wave scene that some Mojo staffers claim could be the next big thing.

music awards mojo marc bolan brian wilson kate bush

VENUEWATCH

Another one bites the dust: Uncle Joes in Jersey City closes. Nothing to do, we suspect, with the Wigan-based Mint Ball company of the same name.

music uncle joes

POPBLOGGING WILL EAT ITSELF

Making its appearance: Tuning Fork, a blog dedicated to reviewing Pitchfork reviews.

music blogs pitchfork

BACK IN TROUBLE

Wasn't "I was so busy, I thought someone else was taking care of it" the excuse Bobby Brown used last time he was up in court for not paying child maintainence? Only he's used exactly the same reason to explain why he's been dragged back to court for not setting up a college fund for his kids. He was preoccupied with making his fly-on-the-wall series, he reckons (although, surely, a fly on the wall show requires him to just go about his everyday life?) and thought that a person from his entourage would be dealing with looking after his kid's future. And they say that Dads today don't care. Brown made a promise to sort out the missed payments. Let's hope he remembers to ask someone to do it.

music bobby brown

BOSTOCK IN THE CLEAR

Good news for Pheena - they can get back to their life of relative obscurity after Ceri Bostock was cleared today of causing actual bodily harm Ceri said she was delighted to reach the end of "six months of hell." Someone should get her and Cheryl Tweedy to do a duet pretty sharpish.

[Updated 23/08/08 to reflect current site style; content unchanged]

THE LAST OF THE CAMPAIGN

He's left it to the very last minute, but at last

music ian brown