Quincy Jones: Dupe?

Quincy Jones is continuing to help the Chinese out arranging their Olympic Games ceremonies, because erm, he isn't going to pull out:

"It's not my intention to withdraw from the Olympics," he was to say in his speech. "I care too much about Darfur and China and if I can stay in the game with others like us, I feel we can make a difference."

Jones hopes to have a role in assembling an ad-hoc committee to "go to Khartoum to sit down and try to get something done," he said. "The whole world has got to start taking responsibility for each other. With communication, you can no longer afford the luxury of thinking of national kinds of issues. Everything that's done anywhere is a world issue, and together there's lots of things we can do that nobody can do alone."

China can become "a hero in the eyes of the world" by sending United Nations African peace enforcers to the Darfur region, stopping arms imports to the area and calling on Khartoum to force the Janajaweed militia to cease its attacks on civilians, Jones said.

So, arranging the Olympics, which is China's attempt to present itself as a modern, friendly, kinda-democratic place, is the right thing to do because "business as usual" is the right message to send?

Does Jones really not see that his continued support for the regime - and the assistance he's giving to their massive sport-themed marketing push this summer - is far, far more valuable than some vague plan about sending an "ad-hoc committee" to see that "something must be done"? Unless Jones has a secret clause in his contract forcing China to address its terrible record, all he's doing is propping up Beijing. Oh, and he's not even going to bother about Tibet at all:

Jones said he is less focused on China's role in Tibetan violence because it "is a difficult one to solve in three months. There's so much history behind it. But Sudan is happening every day. We're talking about babies dying in Darfur, so that one has got me personally."

So, not even bothered about the violent crushing of dissent in Tibet because, ooh, it's a tricky one. Let's not go there, then.

Brian McFadden: Where's the respect?

Poor Brian McFadden is upset that, in Australia, he's known for his girlfriend:

"It can be a little frustrating at times," McFadden revealed. "I did something last night where they introduced me as Delta Goodrem's boyfriend Brian McFadden. It would be nice to have the tag: Brian McFadden, musician and singer. And Delta Goodrem's partner."

Well, yes. But you're probably a little better at being Delta's boyfriend than a musician and singer. Don't discount that as a talent.

So, with his new album out, there's a chance for Brian to show that he isn't just a boyfriend of someone more famous. To strike out. To stop riding on coat tails.

The album sleeve for Set In Stone sees Brian open his heart to Goodrem, who he has been dating since 2004.

He writes: "Delta, my angel. There are no words that could truly describe how much you mean to me or how much I love you. Since you came into my life, the world feels like a better place to be. Thank you for helping me find my vision to be the artist I can be.

"This album would never have happened if there were no you. Every word that leaves my lips is inspired by your greatness. I still can't take my eyes off of you. I love you."

Or perhaps he could just have the album credited to "Delta Goodrem's current boyfriend".

Chef sues Sting

No, not the one who sued Sting and Trude because they sacked her for getting pregnant, this is a different chef entirely, who claims he "wrote" a couple of Police songs.:

The 48-year-old claims he helped write the songs because, wait for it…. he once told Sting about a former girlfriend who was called Roxanne and was a prostitute, and he also told him about how he once wrote a message to his mum and put it in a bottle.

Sting is dismissive of the value of these claims, saying that the chef - a Mr. Deedoodoodeedeedoodoodaa - had serious problems. "It's hard to see how he could have had these conversations as he had personal space issues. He would always be saying "don't stand, don't stand so close to me..." Oh... shit, forget I said that..."

The "Ultimate Honour"

We're surprised to hear from Gigwise that Joy Divison are to get "the ultimate honour".

They're being used to try and push the Zune.

There's going to be a special edition of the music player which has redefined the darker corners of Best Buys up and down the US which, somehow, is going to be a Joy Division version. Because, of course, there's nothing like flogging consumer electronics to make the best use of Ian Curtis' corpse.

Nothing is more important than adoption

Madonna is clearly taking the adoption of David Banda very seriously. Obviously not so seriously that she wanted to live in Malawi to qualify for the usual permission to adopt a child. And, it turns out, not if it gets in the way of promoting the new album.

Darkness at 3AM: A whole new low

really does appear in today's Mirror:

Soap stars Tom Hudson and Lucy Evans are turning Weatherfield into Corriewood with their new dazzling smiles. The pair, who play Paul and Lauren, had their teeth whitened at Manchester's Transform and now boast shiny gnashers.

They could just replace Clemmie and Thingy with a script that would publish press releases straight to the paper. Clearly there's no need for a consideration of editorial values.

Gordon in the morning: Innocent victims

It's not much, but Gordon tries gamely to make a story out of Pixie Geldof leaving a shop with a dress she hasn't paid for.

Rich people like Pixie don't shop in stores where alarms go off when you carry stock out; it's probably why those who do pay end up paying such ridiculous prices for their trousers.

Peaches, apparently, had confused the dress with a scarf:

[S]he then returned with her tail between her legs, explaining she had picked the dress up by mistake because it was the same colour as her scarf.

When she brought the dress back the next day it had the label ripped out. But to make up for the misunderstanding, generous Peaches decided to keep it and paid up.

Presumably the label was ripped out as she sought to discover how her scarf had somehow turned into a dress.

Oddly, Gordon runs a series of pictures of Madonna's children because, erm, they went for a meal.

We're not quite sure how that fits with the Press Complaints Commission code of practice rule 6.v:

v) Editors must not use the fame, notoriety or position of a parent or guardian as sole justification for publishing details of a child’s private life.

I'm sure we're just missing the justification here.

Glastonbury: Dizzee Rascal is surprised

Despite the weeks of Michael Eavis running up to the announcement of Jay-Z as a Glastonbury headline by dropping huge hints that it wasn't going to be wall-to-wall Kings Of Leon, Dizzee Rsacal was surprised:

"It's amazing to me man, as a fan that's just like wow," he added. "I never saw that coming and I could never picture Jay-Z at Glastonbury but it's all good."

It's not just that Rascal is now slightly humped to find that his position as highest-rapper-on-the-bill has been lost which makes Mr. Rascal wonder if the choice is right:

He told 1Xtra: "I don't know if Jay-Z has got that cross over element. Kanye West or Eminem, they've both got that. Jay-Z is a bit of a funny one."

We love the way that Rascal - Britain's foremost rapper - still talks about other rap musicians as if he was working on stock control out the back of Woolworths.

A small glimpse of the Future

From the lovely Futureheads comes this, a previewy glimpse of Broke up Time. It's a sample from their Youth-produced album due at the end of May, This Is Not The World.

Cyrus advance: Here comes the next one

With Hannah Montana now, like, so oooooold, and her human host Miley Cyrus now trying to re-establish control of her body, where will the world find its inoffensively offensive preteen safetydance thrills?

Meet Miranda Cosgrove. She's known to American kids as iCarly, on Nickelodeon. Now, she's releasing an album.

Well, half an album:

The remaining 10 tracks -- all by such teen-friendly Sony artists as Good Charlotte and Avril Lavigne -- were chosen to represent "songs that would appear on Carly's iPod," Sony Music Label Group chairman Rob Stringer said.

This is a brilliant approach to making a record - when you get bored, just drag a bunch of stuff from iTunes into your 'newalbum' folder and you're set.

Don't say you haven't been warned.

The changing of the Sony BMG guard: Clive Davis steps down

Sony BMG has announced that Clive Davis is stepping down as head of BMG and will no longer be in day-to-day charge at RCA.

He's being replaced by Barry Weiss, who until now has been in charge at Zomba and is known for never knowingly spending two bucks when he can get the job done for one.

Of course, no executive ever really disappears, and Sony BMG have found a role by which Clive Davis can continue to draw a salary in a new, vaguely-defined "creative post", which is in no way a forumla for chucking him some money in return for his stepping aside quietly and with no repeat of the balls-up the company made in 2000 when it tried to get shot of him.

It's going to be frustrating for Weiss, trying to trim costs at the label at the same time as the company has to find funds to pay their Denny Crane in his new job.

Britney pays legal bills

Not actually, Britney, of course: she's still unable to control her own financial affairs. But her current conservators, her Dad and Andrew Wallet, have been ordered by a court to pay at least USD375,000 worth of legal bills. It's expected that Spears might still have a few quid left after this. Or at least her Dad and Mr. Wallett will.

Organobit: Danny Federici

The man who played organ and accordion for Bruce Springsteen, Danny Federici, has died.

Danny started playing the accordion at the age of seven, encouraged by a mother who would book him out for parties playing classical and polka tunes. Federici would recall later that:

“I had ‘Danny’ written on my accordion in rhinestones. It was really a corny existence for awhile there. Thank god for rock & roll.”

Rock arrived for Danny in the form of the British Invasion - and, while many of his age group were taking up guitars, Danny decided to put his squeeze box on one side in favour of keyboards. It was a good choice - he joined Child, a band in which his mate Vinnie Lopez was a drummer, and so was behind the right keyboards at the right time when Child took on a new singer, Bruce Springsteen, and started to morph into the E Street Band.

Federici's organ would thus wind up driving Born In The USA and Born To Run, and Danny would spend forty years backing Bruce. But if polka and classical were his initiation, and rock his fortune, it was jazz that would be his life-long love. In 1997, he released Flemington, a solo jazz album and, in 2004, self-released Sweet. V2 eventually picked the record up and gave it a formal release as Out Of A Dream.

For the past three years, Danny had been battling melanoma, a battle he lost yesterday. Bruce Springsteen led the tributes, cancelling his weekend gigs and posting a message on his website:

"Danny and I worked together for 40 years - he was the most wonderfully fluid keyboard player and a pure natural musician. I loved him very much...we grew up together."

A Danny Federici Melanoma Fund is being established in his memory.

Darkness at 3AM: The Mighty Tosh

We're still trying to work out exactly what the 3AM Girls' coverage of man-goes-to-nightclub story is meant to mean:

Booshman Noel Fielding makes a Mighty effort to let us know how famous he is. The comic not only donned a zany cape but got rock 'n' roll buddy Courtney Love to accompany him to The Groucho and Soho House.

Are they suggesting that Fielding was using Courtney Love as some sort of costume jewelery? And hasn't Fielding worn a cape since... well, probably not to school, but we wouldn't be surprised.

But then the 3AM Girls are desperate to believe:

We've seen him singing. Who can forget Amarillo?

You might find that when you watched Peter Kay in the Amarillo video, you weren't watching a man singing, just opening and closing his mouth.

But it turns out that this isn't a piece about Peter Kay at all:

On closer inspection, it turns out to be K.D. Lang - playing the State Theatre in Sydney, Australia last night.

We're sure the homophobic undertinge was accidental.

Gordon in the morning: Madonna will dance for coins

Gordon crunches the numbers on Madonna's upcoming Dubai gigs, and discovers that if you divide an unsubstantiated payrate by an estimated length of concert, she'll be earning an eye-catching but completely spurious £83,333 a minute. We love the way Gordo is accurate to the pound level, despite the numbers he'd making being made-up.

And, while we have no doubt that Madonna will be well rewarded for her visits to the United Arab Emirates, would Gordon be confusing the money paid to stage the concert in total with the cash Madonna will be taking to one of her many homes?

Nice to see that The Sun - still, as I understand it, edited by Rebekah Wade, she of the campaign to rid the nation of paedophiles (and any paediatricians who got caught in the cross-fire, and blokes who were just a little weird but probably up to something) - manages to find room to run slobbering pieces by Gordon over photos of Geri Halliwell dressed as a schoolgirl ("to act out a few fantas. . . I mean sketches") and photos of Angelina Jolie when she was a schoolgirl ("she took part in the racy swimsuit shoot with photographer SEAN McCALL. Looking very fresh-faced, Angelina wore a range of skimpy outfits including a bikini and one-piece bathing suit.")

Exene scene

Some good news: Exene Cervenka has signed a deal for a new album with Bloodshot Records; Rob Miller of Bloodshot is giddy with delight:

It would not be an overstatement to suggest we would not exist if it were not for our deep and longstanding love of Exene's bands X and the Knitters. Life is good when your heroes, and inadvertent mentors, turn out to be really, really cool off the stage and, through the twists and turns and reverberations of our lives, we get to work together."

Of course, it's not only small labels that get that glow - we understand that there are some tax-specialists accountants that Guy Hands has been thrilled to get the opportunity to work alongside at EMI.

Hair today, gone tomorrow

A while back, in what we always assumed was a bid to prove that it's better to irritate and be remembered than entertain and be forgotten, John Frieda hair product adverts would finish with two hairstyles screeching in more-or-less harmony. They've stopped doing that now, but the two hairstyles are still going.

It seems that having been on the very end of a commercial gave them a taste for, if not fame, then a slightly glitzier form of obscurity, and Brit and Alex are now striking out to be proper pop stars.

But, hey, they're serious about their music. They've not just come down in the last America's Got Talent auditions:

We grew up listening to everyone from Michael Jackson to Prince to Aretha Franklin

As wide a range as that, eh? It's only a shame they didn't go really wild and listen to a bit of Stevie Wonder as well.

They're friends of Lulu - no, that's not a euphemism:

"It's amazing that she's remained so normal after so many years in the business, and that's inspiring for us. She's still a very nice person so she's a great role model for us to look up to."

Well, yes. Although somehow, we suspect that being normal isn't something that you find very difficult.

Apparently they "cringe" when they think about the advert:

Can't think why.

We'll try not to let this spoil our summer

James Morrison has decided he's got no choice but to cancel his summer gigging plans. I know, we were disappointed, too.

He's just too busy, says DigitalSpy:

James Morrison has cancelled all his summer gigs to focus on finding a producer for his second album.

It's going to take him all summer to just find a producer? Where's he looking - the source of the Limpopo?

It's not like he couldn't just ring up and book a producer, is it? I mean, obviously, if he mentions his name the guy is going to be like "oh, sorry, James, yeah, I'm producing all summer, booked right up. Sorry", but he could put on a silly voice and pretend to be someone else. Actually, maybe that explains the first album.

Christian charity

MediaGuardian has audio from this morning's Christian O'Connell show where Virgin's breakfast show attempted to punch above its weight when last night's Apprentice firee Simon was late for the interview slot.

We imagine that O'Connell imagined that getting his producer to tell Simon on air he was too late before talking to the show's PR - also on the Mic - was meant to be in some way amusing; trouble is, it backfired terribly.

Had it been one of the more smug Apprentice contestants, closing down the interview might have been funny. But as Simon is incredibly popular, and his reaction to being told he wouldn't be was a good-natured "fair enough, thank you anyway", it just made O'Connell and his team seem incredibly mean spirited.

The berating of press woman Emma, though, was even worse: petulant, self-important bullying:

"We haven't got time now Emma, you've missed your slot. This is Christian live on air. We arranged to do it at five past eight. I've been plugging this show for years. It's late, it's shabby, and Heart are getting it before me. No way. It's over."

If you're going to try and throw your weight about, Christian, you might want to check the your own heft first - the weasly "I've been plugging this show for years" is the sort of line deserving of a boardroom put-down. Where do you really think The Apprentice would be without the endorsement of Virgin's breakfast show? Probably still in the place it's in now, don't you think?

Still, we're sure Heart will be delighted to know they can have a couple of extra minutes with next week's firee.

The Kooks: Have they ever heard themselves?

Kierkegaard, it was, who observed that "a man may accomplish many feats and comprehend a vast amount of knowledge and still have no understanding of himself", so perhaps we shouldn't be too hard on Luke Pritchard, a man who clearly has no understanding of himself or his band at all.

The Kooks are playing some gigs in the US, and Luke feels the hand of history on his shoulder:

"I'm a romantic ya know," coos the crooner, "and it's quite a romatic thing to come over from England like the Beatles or Stones and have that relationship with America and bring our music over there."

Obviously, the Kooks have travelled across from England, and, yes, The Beatles and the Stones did do the same, but we'd suggest that - unless we've missed scenes of screaming teenagers greeting them at the airports - there are few parallels beyond that.

But Luke hasn't finished. You might think they're stage school mass-market pop, but - oh, no, no:

"Playing live and playing on the record are two different things," he says. "When we play live we are not trying to re-create the record. We are more like a punk band when we play live, so you can expect absolute anarchy from the stage."

Again, let's be fair - when he says they're more like a punk band live, there's absolutely no way they could be any less like a punk band than their bland, please-like-me, lets-not-rock-the-boat records; but "absolute anarchy"? From The Kooks?

PluggedIn goes live

So, PluggedIn has launched its Public Beta version - presumably, they're keeping the unique selling point back for the full launch. Because it sounds like, well, everything else:

Filter the noise. Hear the music.
Join today and personalize your experience!
PluggedIn.com is a place to get the hottest music videos, photos, blogs, news, recommendations and more, from artists that matter most to you - in one place. You can:

* Save the stuff you like, create playlists and share them.
* Promote your taste in music and meet other music fans.
* Get recommendations based on the music you like.

We love the implication about "filtering the noise" as if the internet is so difficult to navigate that hip-hop fans spend their time mournfully downloading the Oliver soundtrack while fans of folk can only ever discover Napalm Death tracks when they go onto YouTube. Your proposition is poor if you're having to pretend you're solving a problem that doesn't exist.

And while community features are fun, aren't the public starting to tire of sites which launch like that map in Blackadder ("could you just fill it in as you go along, please?") - there's loads of sites that will tell you what other songs are a bit like the songs you're currently listening to, numerous places on the web to watch videos and make a list of bands that you like. Why come and do it all over again on PluggedIn?

Sure, they've got licensed videos, but only 10,000 - the cupboard is so bare, one of the "hottest music videos" they're promoting on their homepage, on launch day, is Eminem's Lose Yourself, which while not quite of pensionable age is at least old enough to stay up past midnight and buy beer without being asked for ID.

Will Smith and his Overbrook backers have put two million into the project, which at least is money they can afford to lose.

He means "not enought Take That"

Gary Barlow doesn't like American radio because it doesn't play enough Take That ("doesn't stimulate him"):

"The radio plays records too much in America. It's monotonous."

He means, I suspect, that they play the same record too often, rather than what he actually said, which would imply he switches on the radio and exclaims "I can't believe it - they're playing a record again. Why can't they just tap things together if they have to broadcast sounds?"

Unthank you

In today's Telegraph, there's an interview with the wonderful Rachel Unthank promoting what the paper calls their "latest album" The Bairns. Obviously, it is the latest album, although since it came out in August last year it's not quite as new as the paper might suggest.

You'd have thought the Telegraph would have been able to understand the value of folk music from a nationhood point of view if not out of sympathy for the citizenry, but even this paper struggles to get past the idea that folk music is a chore:

While there's no doubt that the band have given English folk music a shot in the arm, many argue that the real national folk music comes from artists such as Ian Dury and the Kinks, and that conventional folk music is an anachronism. Why sing about knights and maidens when you could be singing about people in call centres?

"Partly it's about respect for previous generations, keeping their stories alive," says McNally. Unthank says: "If you made a piece of art or wrote a book in 1900, you could see it in a museum or read the book. That's what we are doing with songs.

"Not that folk music is a museum thing - you can use modern sensibilities to communicate a timeless story. And most of the stories we sing are about love and loss and death and things that never change."

Still, the interview's heart is in the right place and it's nice to see the Winterset getting the attention they deserve.

Darkness at 3AM: Facing up to Norman Cook

They really do have trouble making 3AM work online, don't they? They've had a bit of a shuffle around again this morning, but it still doesn't quite work - some of the stories now have teasers, but others are still just a linked headline - Linds Lured, anyone?

The column marks the 25th anniversary of Mixmag with, erm, an anecdote:

Fatboy Slim certainly won't forget the day his head was on the front cover - superimposed on another man's buff body. An insider said: "His missus Zoe's gay mates all thought he was gay... He looked so fit!"

What sort of quote is that? It implies that Zoe Ball has gay friends but Norman Cook doesn't, for a start. Or perhaps it just means that only Zoe's gay friends are incapable of spotting a playful bit of photoshopping. And why would a gay man assume a person is gay because he's had his face photoshopped onto someone else's body? Do the 3AM Girls really think there are gay men who are that dim?

Gordon in the morning: The difference between wit and crudity

Gordon claims that Pearl Spam and Gavin Rossdale's kid "model" Daisy Lowe is dating Mark Ronson. Clearly, he's got a problem as this is his big story for that day, and "Ronson dating Lowe" is all he's got. Trouble is, he's had to spin a three word story into 500-odd words - so desperate to fill the piece, not only does he mention Powder but even finds space to mention Institute, Rossdale's barely-functioning vanity project.

Let's assume that it's just the desperation of trying to fill a page from nothing that accounts for the awful headline:

Pushing up Daisy

We know Gordon isn't writing for the Church Times, but even by his standards that stands out as a spectacularly crass and crude piece of work.

In fact, it's starting to look like Smart is struggling to find anything to fill his acres of space with. Woman you've never heard of wears tight t-shirt, anybody? Even Gordon acknowledges that he's struggling with the "celebrity" value of this piece of celebrity gossip:

US GIRL group DANITY KANE are fairly unknown over here.

But...

Is there a but?

member AUBERY O'DAY is doing her best to change that by wearing this see-through top.

The top, it's worth noting, isn't actually see-through at all, but you can - if you're about thirteen years old and have nothing better to do - make out the shape of her nipple through it when a photo is taken in bright light.

Hmmm. Photos of breasts of anonymous young women. You could buy Nuts if you really wanted that, couldn't you?

It's also worth pointing out that, far from trying to make Danity Kane "known over here" by wearing clothes, O'Day was actually turning up for an interview with MTV in America. Is it really plausible that she thought "let's see if I can get in the British papers by accidentally showing the shape of a nipple?"

£17.50

Thirty five dollars. According to PaidContent, that's what Nokia is going to give Universal in return for every one of its customers having unlimited access to the Universal library.

The labels have been keen to shift to this sort of deal for ages - oh, the joy of money upfront - but when you look at that figure, you have to wonder if they've really thought 'all you can eat' through: selling everything for the sort of figure they could get for a couple of albums a few years back. Is that really going to sustain the major's investments in future acts, keep shareholders happy, pay subs to RIAA and their lawyers, and still put money in the management's pocketbooks?

Having spent the best part of a decade pouring cash into trying to stop people from stealing their product, they're now giving it away.

Sadly, they didn't call the rollercoaster the Love Is Like A Rollercoaster rollercoaster

How do you test a theme park? Presumably by inviting in some people for go on the rides who it wouldn't be too upsetting if they discovered missing safety rails or loose bolts.

Somehow, they've managed to find some people to do this testing for the ill-conceived Hard Rock Theme Park. They're calling it a Sound Check, because it's a phrase that has something to do with music but doesn't really make sense being applied to tests on rollercoasters, in much the same way that the theme of the park has something to do with music but not in any way that makes sense.

The park is happy with how it went, but not going into too much detail:

Park officials would not say exactly how many people came, citing competitive reasons.

Competitive reasons? What, is there a giant swing-boat with Black Sabbath logos painted on the side down the street, ready to compete with the Led Zeppelin rollercoaster?

GM drops TI

Getting busted for waggling his guns about has proved expensive for TI: GM have decided that they really don't want to be associated with him. In total, TI reckons his crimes have cost him somewhere in the region of twelve million dollars.

Which means he's made an expensive mistake. And that he used to be totally over-valued.

Holding out for Celebrity Gladiators: Bez goes bust again

Having cleared his last bankruptcy by winning Celebrity Big Brother, Bez is now back to square one: he's bankrupt again.

Apparently the Insolvency Register lists him as "journalist and musician", which seems to be wrong. Twice.

Kate Nash: Supreme or chicken supreme?

Plucked from something she did for Virgin Radio, this is either an act of unspeakable desecration or a loving tribute. Kate Nash covers the Supremes:



[via The Music Slut]