No Rock And Roll Fun

REEKY INGLESIAS: Okay, we're in no place to complain about sudden commercialisation, but even so... in the round up of musicians looking to squeeze a little extra out, Enrique Inglesias will now testify as to the quality and delights of Tommy Hilfiger perfumes. Enrique will be the face and - if we ask him nicely - the shirtless chest of True Star Men. I know what you're wondering - why Enrique? Why, Tommy Hilfiger, why did you choose him?

"Enrique represents the universal power of music. His worldwide appeal brings an exciting new spirit and depth to the Tommy Hilfiger Fragrance business. We are excited to be entering into this partnership and look forward to collaborating with him for many years to come," said Fabrice Weber, President, Aramis and Designer Fragrances.

The Universal Power of Music - of course he is. We knew that. Shame on us for thinking the phrase "Brad pissed away his chance when he split with that nice woman" may have come up there. But Enrique, surely, has his reasons for this exciting new partnership, doesn't he? You bet:

"Creating a fragrance will be an exciting way to reach new fans while connecting with those people who already enjoy my music," said Enrique. "I have always admired Tommy Hilfiger and am excited about this new venture with Tommy Hilfiger Toiletries."

"... oh, and there's an enormous cheque involved, too." We're a little confused as to who the 'new fans' are that might come to love Inglesias through his bottle of overpriced aftershave - have you ever met someone at a gig who said "Yeah, at first I really found Destiny's Child grating, but since I started dabbing a spot of Beyonce's Perfume behind my ears, I've really warmed to them..."

We note, however, that Enrique has abandoned his attempts to become known solely by the single name, and - as with the Daily Mirror when its attempts to become merely the Mirror stiffed - has reverted to using both his names when trying to let people remember who he is.

Meanwhile, the marketing department's dream boys, Maroon 5, have signed some sort of deal to do a tour in praise of the Honda Civic.

Civic drivers were reported to be ecstatic that their car of choice is being linked with such a quality act.