Saturday, February 06, 2016

Woot-ton: Dan takes a nuanced position

These days, you'll be aware, Dan Wootton, once of the News Of The World is now sitting in Gordon Smart's old chair at Bizarre.

He's really keen that people keep things classy:



Perhaps Dan could show us one conducts themselves with his required degree of class?




Sonu Nigam slightly overestimates how great his singing is

Sonu Nigam was on a chartered flight, and encouraged to sing a song or two over the PA system. He obliged.

Trouble is, nowadays if things like that happen, it gets shared on the net, and people hear about it. Including the safety regulators of Indian flights. They're not happy, and have called in the executives from Jet, the airline involved, to ask why a safety tool was being used as an entertainment platform.

Jet, in the face of a potential punishment for letting this happen, have had to take action; and so they've suspended the flight crew involved to try and head that off by looking like they're taking it seriously.

Sonu, though, has decided to wade into the debate, missing the point and the finer detail completely:

In a statement, Nigam Friday said, “I have witnessed an elaborate fashion show in an aircraft. I have heard of small concerts happening in aircraft. I have seen pilots and crew members cracking jokes to loosen up passengers in other countries, which is so cool. To suspend crew members for asking me to sing on the address system, when the seat belt signs were off, and no announcements were to be made, is nothing less than punishing someone for spreading happiness.” “Pity there’s no one to question such harshness except the media perhaps. Indians, need to loosen up. This act of lack of common sense, according to me, is real intolerance,” he added.
It's real intolerance, people. Punishing people for spreading happiness. I mean, under what circumstances might you suddenly need to make a cabin announcement on a plane, right? That hardly ever happens. That people survive to tell you about, anyway.


Stone Temple Pilots hang a 'help wanted' sign in the window

There is nothing desperate at all in the Stone Temple Pilots search for someone, anyone to do the singing bit:

2016 marks a new year for Stone Temple Pilots…
Point of fact: 2016 marks a new year for everyone. That's pretty much how new years work.
A year of hope, optimism, and most importantly, new music! We are immensely proud of all that we have been able to share with you over the years. Music, music, music. We very much want to continue doing that, but that’s going to take a little help from all of you.

As you know, prior to the untimely passing of our brother in arms, Scott, we had been working with the incomparable Chester Bennington. What you also likely know is that having Chester front two bands of this size and scope was too much for one man to be able to do and so regretfully we had to move onto a new chapter together. This is where you come in…
Let's just look at that sentence there again, shall we?
What you also likely know is that having Chester front two bands of this size and scope was too much for one man to be able to do and so regretfully we had to move onto a new chapter together.
Let's look at it again.
What you also likely know is that having Chester front two bands of this size and scope was too much for one man to be able to do and so regretfully we had to move onto a new chapter together.
That's three times we've read that sentence, which is figure is at least six times more than it was read before it was published.
We are officially announcing that we are seeking a new vocalist to front Stone Temple Pilots. We’ve already heard from many talented people, but want to make this an opportunity for many more so we’ve set up a way for you to do just that.
This is the reverse of when someone calls a place to tell them they've got a bunch of fantastic job offers but just wanted to see if you're hiring right now to give you an opportunity to get on board.

"Hey, look at all these talented people who want to front our band"
"We should definitely see if there are any other talented people who want to front our band by putting a message on the internet".


That free Rihanna album redux

Last weekend I was in Amsterdam, so this is the first opportunity to react to the question why did Rihanna give her album away for free on Tidal?

To which there are two, interconnected answers:

Number one: because it's effectively patting Taylor Swift on the head and saying 'shush now about streaming sites only making you a tiny, tiny bit richer';

Number two: because when was the last time you even remembered Tidal even existed?

Hats off to her for coming up with an advertising campaign for a dying platform in which she's invested while making it look like she doesn't care about money. It's evil, but stylishly evil.


Monday, February 01, 2016

Phil Anselmo can't be a Nazi because he's not clubbable

Phil Anselmo's Nazi salute and "white power" cry during a Dimebag Darrell memorial hasn't gone down well - and perhaps the best thing about this whole story has been the way metal fans have called him out on it.

Phil has tried two approaches now to try and explain what he might have been doing.

Attempt number one was to try and claim he was making a reference to the wine being served backstage:

He claimed at first he had been making a joke about the white wine served to performers at the event, who included Dave Grohl and members of Metallica, and said: “I fucking love everyone, I fucking loathe everyone, and that’s that. No apologies from me.”
In a lot of ways, that's probably a worse claim than the original - everyone expects Anselmo to spout Nazi bollocks, but suggesting that he was organising a protest against the backstage spritzers paints a picture of what happens when entitlement collides with too much time on a person's hands.

Still, he's realised that "I was taking wine" wasn't going to work, and he's now issued a statement:
Philip H Anselmo here, and I’m here to basically respond to all the heat I’ve been getting that I deserve completely.

“I was at the Dimebash, and it was extremely late at night. There was heavy-duty talk between myself and those who love Dime. And heavy emotions were flowing, jokes were made backstage that transpired upon the stage, and it was ugly. It was uncalled for. And anyone who knows me and my true nature knows that I don’t believe in any of that; I don’t want to be part of any group. I’m an individual, and I am a thousand percent apologetic to anyone that took offence to what I said because you should have taken offence to what I said. And I am so sorry, and I hope you just … man, give me another chance to … just give me another chance. I love all of you. And anyone who’s met me, anyone who knows me knows that I love all of you. Bless you.”
This might have worked if he'd not tried to pass it all off as vinicultural humour a couple of days earlier.

Two great problems lurk in this apology, though: the first being that jokes from backstage were "transpiring" on stage, which suggests that other performers might have been having a third-reich yukfest and only Anselmo was gauche enough to take his Hitlerian hijinks the wrong side of the curtain.

The second is that he seems to be pleading with us to believe he couldn't be a Nazi because he's not the sort of guy who joins things.

No, Phil. We'd want to know you're not a Nazi because Nazism is an odious skunk of a political ideology, not because you'd find it a faff to have to turn up to meetings and maintain your membership fees.


Leo Sayer is probably a little disappointed this morning

Back in November, Leo Sayer was talking up the possibility that he was going to play the Legends slot at Glastonbury.

He was sort-of-right; turns out it's going to be ELO not LEO.

Or, rather, whatever the legally allowable format of the Electric Light Orchestra is these days - Jeffy Lyne's Electrish Light Orchestra or something like that.


David Bowie: Tribute oddity

From the YouTube channel of Simon Price, a fairground organ in Utrecht plays Space Oddity:


Djobit: Terry Wogan

Arriving back in the UK from a weekend in Amsterdam, on a TV screen glimpsed through a security window was a grinning, waving Terry Wogan. We already knew, of course - this is the 21st Century and you don't have to wait anymore until the news, on the hour, with James Alexander Gordon, to find out what's going on.

My Mum loved Radio 2, or at least loved it enough to be able to listen to it during the day, and much of my early musical experience came from 233 and 330 (less so Stereo VHF). Both Waggoner's' Walks, Diddy David Hamilton, Pete Murray, Jimmy Young and, every breakfast, Terry Wogan. This was his first run of breakfast shows - the era of Pru Forrest, JR, and suggesting that Super Trouper claims Abba were making telephone calls from Tesco. It seemed to be at the time that doing the breakfast show on Radio 2 must surely be the most desirable job in the world.

Along with Ribena and fried eggs, Wogan was how I woke up every morning - calming and reassuring, especially on those mornings when my eyes had gummed themselves shut and I'd come to in panic and fear. He was the very model of avuncularity and, although my tastes moved on, I'll miss knowing he's around.