Friday, July 01, 2005


The lengths to which Bob Geldof has managed to hijack the entire Make Poverty History campaign and confuse "watching Joss Stone do her White Stripes cover" with "take action to try and force politicians to change the balance of our relationship with nations across the planet where people are living in extreme want" is demonstrated by today's Mirror, which has the confusing strapline "Make Poverty History - One Day To Go." As if Live8 is the end in itself:

The Guardian seems to be the only paper which caught Bob Geldof and Tony Blair sharing a platform (and an awful lot of empathetic nodding) on MTV yesterday. There was a time when a Prime Minister appearing on young people's TV programmes would have been a major event and the subject of much comment. Nowadays, Blair pops up on CBBC so often he was briefly in the running to join the Blue Peter team:

The Times has the most eye-catching heading:

Twenty Years Ago Tomorrow. We're not sure if this is a cheeky lament for how bloody middle-aged the line-up is, but the paper seems to be most excited by the Kaiser Chiefs, so perhaps it is.

The Sun, meanwhile, is afraid that Live 8 isn't dull and predictable enough, and so has published the full running order of every song. So you can plan when to take a toilet break:

- as in, pinpoint the few seconds when it's safe to come out of the toilet and rush past your TV.

Finally, it takes the Star to get to the heart of the real scandal - no booze. Which wouldn't be so bad, except it seems those people in the Corporate Hospitality zone will be allowed to guzzle beers, wines and fruit-based alcoholic drinks. We're all in this together, then, except some of us are in this in a little more comfort: