Wednesday, February 14, 2007

I'm not even sure Bikinilicious is a word, you know

Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue occupies a special place in the pantheon of porn-lite: it's there for the kids too afraid to try Playboy and whose households don't have room for the National Geographic. It's erotica for the weak-willed. And it still tries to pretend that it's in some way an educational experience - in the sense of having something useful to say about swimwear in modern America, not in the sense of teaching teens why they should switch the radio on when they explore pictures of half-undressed ladies.

This year, though, the Swimsuit edition of Sports Illustrated is, in itself, a special edition - for some reason, it's a music/bikini special. To this end, Beyonce is on the cover, with the words "as you've never seen her before" - although, frankly, "not wearing many clothes" seems to sum up precisely how we've seen Beyonce every time before, to be honest.

It won't sell any music. It won't sell any swimsuits. But it might sell a pile of magazines.