St Lucia extends its warmth to Amy Winehouse

I'm starting to think that Amy Winehouse's long sojourn in St Lucia might be making the island the UK equivalent of Guantanamo - a small place overseas where we've dumped something we're not quite sure how to deal with.

It sounds like St Lucia has had enough, too. "Former government official" Jeff Fedee has written something for the papers:

Referring to her ill-fated recent live comeback at the recent St Lucia Jazz Festival, which he watched, Fedee insisted she "needs help".

"For me it was a stomach churning experience to witness a reptilian looking character with a skeleton frame, staggering onto the stage, barely fitting into what appeared to be a size zero dress, cut just above an unsightly crotch.

"I thought Amy Winehouse should be locked up, be put in compulsory rehab and force fed to put some flesh on her insect frame", he wrote.

Doesn't everyone have a skeleton frame? Otherwise you'd be kind of lolling about on the floor. Which, come to think of it, isn't entirely unknown behaviour for Amy Winehouse.

And I'm struggling with the dress - again, not entirely unknown behaviour for Whitehouse. Does Fedee really mean the dress was cut above the crotch? It seems a little unlikely that she'd have gone on stage with a dress that didn't at least cover that. But if it did go far enough, then how would Fedee know it was an "unsightly" crotch? And what makes a crotch unsightly? Neo-brutalist concrete shopping centres? Graffiti?

I'm sure he was writing out of genuine concern, but if St Lucia's approach to people looking painfully thin is to deprive them of their liberty and force-feed them... well, maybe it is a bit like Guantanamo after all.