Gordon in the morning: Shifting fields of battle

Because Gordon loves the idea of a chart battle, a shift in record company distribution plans, moving the Take That album to November 15th isn't simply a reaction to earlier supply and a way of maximising units shifted pre-Christmas, it's a major shift in the theatre of war:

WESTLIFE will be crying into their Guinness tonight.

TAKE THAT have lobbed a massive spanner into the Irish lads' plans for chart domination with their new album Gravity.

GARY BARLOW, MARK OWEN, JASON ORANGE, HOWARD DONALD and their old pal ROBBIE WILLIAMS have moved the release date of their new album Progress forward to the same day, November 15.

All the four-leaf clovers in the world won't help in Westlife HQ when word filters through to the lads.

Some of you might think Gordon's lobbing in of Irish stereotypes is a bit obscene; others will be surprised he didn't work in a reference to potato famines.

But if Westlife are the new losers, who are the winners?

Da Loif's loss is a huge gain for JLS. Their second album, Out Of This World, was originally due to go head-to-head with Take That.

They will now have the chance to knock the elder statesmen of pop, or Westlife, off the top spot after only a week.

If Gary Barlow is the elder statesman in his thirties, what does that make Cliff Richard?

Still, even Gordon is a realist:

I can't see it happening, but it is going to make for a great chart battle.

No, no it isn't.

Last night a Take That spokesman said the release date change was because of the huge response to their press conference at London's Savoy hotel on Tuesday announcing their tour dates.

I reckon the real reason is to give them an extra week to fill their boots with monster sales in the Christmas market.

Do you think, Gordon? Almost as if the chart position doesn't mean a thing to anyone, outside someone with a few column inches to fill.

There's also some story about Joe Cole renaming his box after Liam Gallagher's trouser company. It turns out it's about Cole's football-watching box.