Friday, November 15, 2002

Fly swatting

Of course, it's not a victimless crime, is it? Walls get all sticky. But you have to clear a small space on your desk, preferably one with a support strut underneath, and bring your skull repeatedly down onto it when you hear that Liverpool City Council are wasting money putting together a "hit squad" to target flyposters.

Now, in this city, the flyposters are pretty fair - they don't post in inappropriate places (normally), sticking to places where it usually adds to the bustle of the city. It helps develop small events, and small promoters, which you would have thought would be a key aim of a place bidding to be Capital of Culture with a straight face. But, no, for some reason they've decided to crack down.

Our favourite flyposting crackdown was when Leeds Council painted over any poster on the walls - thereby meaning instead of nice designed advertising, the city was covered with large black squares, making it like a three dimensional version of a porn mag in 60's Ireland.

Why are Liverpool pouring money into a problem that doesn't exist, when illegal parking - which is dangerous and causes wasted time and money for everyone - is rife, and when, frankly, the streets of the town are covered in shit and wrappers blowing in the wind?

More to the point, wannabe mayor Mike Storey believes:

"Fly posting is becoming a real problem in the city with the situation getting worse all the time."

His administration has some gall, since they actually auctioned off the city's skyline, allowing CocaCola to hang a giant flypost from the top of St John's Tower - luckily, everyone involved was so crap the thing blew down the first time the wind puffed. Meanwhile, they're about to close the Neptune theatre to make way for some shops and seek to Ozymandisise themselves by inflicting a dim new building on the waterfront. Compared to the horrors Storey and his crew are vandalising our home with, a couple of A5 ads for a Tribute To Nothing gig is chickenfeed.

There's more - if you want it - on the Liverpool Waterfront, plus BBC Bashing examined, and the link between the Butler and Shayler - over on the colour supplement.

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