Monday, July 28, 2003

CHARTWATCH: Beyonce finally loses it at the top of the singles chart, being replaced by Daniel Beddingfield (Never Gonna Leave Your Side) ; he must be the first New Zealander to have a UK number one since… well, since we were born, at least. This doesn't, unfortunately, manage to make him any more interesting. Daniel's always seemed to us to be The Bloke Who Couldn't Be Arsed to Queue For Pop Idol; we suspect that the record buying public constantly get him confused with Darius and buy his records on that basis. Both artists shaved at about the same time, too. Luckily, Beyonce sells enough to force The Stereophonics into a debut at number three with Maybe Tomorrow, but that's still a depressing indication of just how many people can be bothered to go out and swap cash for a slightly-new Stereophonics single. Other Top Ten newbies are Deepest Blue, with Deepest Blue at seven, and Tripe Eight who, unsatisfyingly, enter at nine with Give Me A Reason. Triple 8 are almost so background-noise that all we can think to mention is they share their name with the page Ceefax uses for subtitles; we suspect selecting this feature when they appear on Top of the Pops might be the best way to enjoy them.

All-American Rejects' Swing Swing mystifyingly is in at thirteen and it's likely that Goldfrapp only making 25 with Strict Machine will be a bit of a blow to the label, what with all the effort they've been putting in. In her Catatonia days, Cerys Matthews' record label would have held a crisis meeting if she'd entered at 43 with Caught In The Middle; nowadays, with her new countryish direction and downsized lifestyle, that'll probably be seen as a good result. The Tindersticks will be gloomy with a number 60 placing for Sometimes It Hurts, but that's just them, isn't it? And both Melanie C and One True Voice benefit from the summer radio station promo circuit, as On The Horizon and Shakespeares Way With Words manage to return to the lower reaches of the 75. Still underperforming, perhaps, but a little less shamefully.

In Albums, Beyonce holds firm, although there a single-aided rally for Daniel Beddingfield sees him snapping at her heels with Gotta Get Through This (up from 13 to two); Super Furries' Phantom Power comes in at a satisfying number four. Kym Marsh's Standing Tall enters at number nine; not as bad as it could have been, but hardly an earth-shattering start considering the hoofing round the chatshow circuit she's been doing. If she doesn't improve next week, she'll need to start sending her CV to Bolloms. Janes Addiction's Strays makes a disappointing 14 - did they come back for this? - but we'd imagine they're expecting a long haul for the title anyway; Lollopalooza headlines are all well and good but they don't shift records in Daventry. Dolly Parton's heavily-supported (oh, stop, would you?) Ultimate makes a tidy number 17. Dizzee Rascal proves that getting stabbed has no sales uplift unless you actually get killed in the event (Boy In Da Corner, 40).

The extent to which you can milk a stone has now been scientifically proven - The diehard fans obviously bought the Manics Bsides compilation in the first week; this week, it languishes at 48, awaiting such time as it might be a more attractive "three for twenty quid" proposition.


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