Saturday, September 02, 2006


Besides introducing about a third of a million people to its current delights - more building work than could have been summoned by the Marshall Plan and a rusting hulk bobbing in the Mersey - Liverpool also took the opportunity of the Mathew Street Festival to sign up some top-flight support for its year as the City of Culture.

The Proclaimers are in.

Well, at least they're internationally known, and must get to travel a lot to play to, uh, conventions or whatever. Who else is in?

At least twelve bands, reports the Echo:

They include Doctor and the Medics, Amsterdam, the Aeroplanes, and tribute artists Guns 2 Roses, Johnny Silver, and Definitely Might Be - who perform the music of Mancunians Oasis.

Obviously, not the whole dozen are going to be up to the standards of Definitely Might Be, which is why the paper has chosen not to mention the names of the rest: why, it could be a list of tribute acts and that might just look desperate.

And U2 tribute band Elevation added: "We don't know anyone in Liverpool who doesn't like music, sport or the arts. We've travelled extensively and have yet to find an atmosphere as creative as this city."

There presumably aren't many people anywhere who don't like at least one of the three options - unless Elevation have visited a place where all the citizens existed merely to shovel food into their mouths, poop, and operate the giant machinery which keeps the food coming and the poop going. And what would such a nightmare city want with a pretend U2 band?

And forgive us for pointing this out, but Amsterdam are a local band anyway - so you would expect them to be singing the praises of Liverpool, with or without an ambassdorship in their back pocket. Indeed, our experience of Liverpool guitar bands suggests they tend towards denying the existence of other cities, so getting a quote from one saying "Liverpool's brilliant" it's not very much of a coup; it's like getting a drunk bloke to admit that you're his bestest mate in the world.