The offspring should spring off

Neither Kimberley Stewart nor Damian, Ziggy and Julian Marley have achieved very much besides having origins in famous sperm¹, so it must have been a difficult choice for the management at London club Prophecy when both tried to claim the best table in the house. It's a pity someone who had actually achieved something in their own right - like, I don't know, Maureen off Driving School - wasn't there to stake a stronger claim and solve the conundrum.

Apparently glasses got smashed, harsh words exchanged; eventually, the Marleys won the table. They did keep an eye on the door in case Bill Oddie's daughter swung by.

1. Please, don't even think of saying 'what about the Melody Makers' here. Thank you.