Thursday, July 10, 2008

Gordon in the morning: Bandages and wheelchairs

It's not clear if the Department of Homeland Security has yet devised a scale to reflect the current desperation level in an artist's career, but if so, we're guessing that they're currently trying to find something more red than the deepest crimson for the Madonna and Britney backdrop tour video thingy.

Gordon, of course, laps it all up:

An on-set source revealed: “It’s absolutely classic Madonna. Probably the raunchiest stuff she has ever done. It leaves nothing to the imagination and will be very controversial.

“Britney and Madonna are unwrapped like mummies, to appear together almost naked apart from tiny leather bondage pants and knee-high boots.

“They then dance closely together, pressing their hands and bodies together.

“There will be big rows over whether it is sexy, shocking or both.”

The possibility - that it's neither, and sounds like someone who has not only run out of ideas but has also lost the telephone number of anyone she might have once known who might have a new idea - doesn't seem to have occurred to anyone. Madonna pawing Britney again? Who would get excited by that?
sexy shenanigans

sexy shenanigans

... apart from...
sexy shenanigans

... Gordon, of course.

Meanwhile, Gordon - in common with everyone else in the entire world - runs the photos of Michael Jackson being pushed about in a wheelchair. Smart and US editor Emily Smith continue to reflect the Sun's sensitivity on disability - the page is titled "Michael Jackson is reduced to using a wheelchair." "Reduced to", eh?


Unknown said...

I can't wait until the inevitable Gordon exclusive with Noel Gallagher. A meeting of minds, that'll be.

Anonymous said...

Ah, the sound of two desperate careers rubbing up against each other. Gordon's page has a rubbish Photoshop job of "how they might look" i.e. nothing like they might look, that's worthy of the Newton era.

Laura Brown said...

Maybe by "reduced to using a wheelchair" they mean "as opposed to being borne on a litter by a brace of adoring lackeys."

Anonymous said...

“There will be big rows over whether it is sexy, shocking or both.”

Rows? where? I don't think anyone at the Mail will care about this one. People are going to be shocked by this how? By her doing something that is far less controversial than things she done 20 years ago? And certainly it won't be sexy. Old woman touches young girl in revealing clothes is probably a niche thing.

It incredible to think that if it were an old man and a 20something male pop star (who's seen better days) Gordon would probably be disgusted and campaign against it.

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