Gordon in the morning: You leave my Noelie alone, you nasty man

It is, perhaps, no surprise that Gordon Smart sides with Noel Gallagher in the ongoing Jay-Z-Noel Gallagher spat. Jay-Z has made Noel a target on a track on the new album. Gordon is not impressed:

I WISH JAY-Z would stop banging on about his war of words with NOEL GALLAGHER.

At least Smart is wise enough to not pretend it's a battle of wits.

The Jiggaman is clearly intent on fanning the flames of ill feeling.

Gordon, of course, can't stand to see conflict and ill-feeling. You'll recall how he went out his way earlier this year to try and heal the rift between Cheryl and Ashley Cole, for example.

Incidentally, seeing Gordon use the name "Jiggaman" is spectacularly uncomfortable, isn't it? It's like Prince Charles calling people "my homies".

After Noel questioned the wisdom of having a hip hopper top the bill at Glasto, former drug dealer Jay-Z started his controversial headline show with a poorly sung cover of the Manc titans’ 1995 anthem.

Poorly sung? Really, Gordon? And what's with the "former drug dealer"? Given that - ahem - the "Manc titans" recorded a song which opened with the lines "all your dreams are made when you're chained to the mirror and the razorblade" it's a bit ill-advised to try and protect Noelie by suggesting that his nemesis might have got muddled up in drugs in the past.

Jockin’ Jay-Z is the first single to be lifted off the rapper’s forthcoming album The Blueprint 3.

“Jockin” means to insult.

Thanks for the helpful explanation, Gordon. Is "the Blueprint" some kind of devious streetslang, too?

Gordon has one last push:

The collection hits shops this autumn, around the time Noel and co return with the album Dig Out Your Soul.

Jay’s last CD, American Gangster, hardly set the charts alight.

I wonder which of the new ones will be better received by UK fans?

Gordon works for the Sun, it's no surprise he considers large sales to be equivalent to being morally in the right.

Well, phonelines were jammed when tickets for Oasis’s UK tour went on sale this week.

But make up your own mind.

Click here to buy music and videos from Oasis

That could, of course, be considered to be leading the witness.