Saturday, November 22, 2008

Gordon in the morning: Old men fighting

Gordon Smart is studiously attempting to give relevancy to Oasis, by helping orchestrate a feud between Noel Gallagher and Mick Hucknall. No, really.

Yesterday, Gordon flagged up this from Hucknall:

When asked why he thought Noel was pushed off stage by a crazed fan in Canada in September, Mick spat: “Was that for making the North sound stupid?

“I love that HARRY ENFIELD sketch when KATHY BURKE comes back from a weekend in Manchester walking with a Liam gait and goes, ‘Fuckin’ sound. Bangin’. They’ve made a cliché out of presenting Northerners, especially Mancunians, like that.”

Today, Gordon has got Noel to reply in an open letter:
You still going? Wow.

The last time I heard of you, Fanta-pants, you were getting slung out of Knebworth for being shit and fat.

What you have to say about Manchester and its righteous natives is irrelevant as you are from Warrington

If Knebworth throw you out for being fat and shit, how come Robbie played there for more nights than you managed, Noel?

Given that Noel lives in London, you might wonder if his opinion on Mancunians is that relevant; especially since he seems incapable of telling the difference between Warrington (to the West, in Cheshire) and Denton, where Hucknall actually comes from (in the East, firmly in Greater Manchester). Even if Mick was a Warringtonian, it wouldn't matter anyway, given that his main gripe was that Oasis had made everyone from the North a laughing stock.

And Noel's letter actually seems to offer support for Mick's view that Oasis are little more than honking idiots.

None of this, though, really matters compared with the fawning of Gordon as he introduces Noel's words:

Gallagher's note impressed, Mick

BIZ Lord Noel sends Mick Hucknall an open letter in reply to his Madchester outburst
So today, in a spirit of fairness, allow me to present axe-Lord NOEL’s thoughts on Mick’s theory in an open letter to him.

But surely, Gordon, if you love Noel so much, a true servant would have quietly lost the letter rather than let his master make such a bally fool of himself?