Stuck On Repeat 2009: July

Brian May was vexed at the tracks Michael Jackson recorded with Freddie Mercury circulating on the internet. Nancy Pelosi told the Senate not to waste its time making an empty genuflection in Jacko's direction. It turned out that Jackson's total sales were routinely quadrupled in reports.

The always tiresome Taxpayers Alliance counted the number of people producing the BBC's coverage of Glastonbury, which the deemed an outrage. Charles Moore was even more outraged because Jonathan Ross was still working for the BBC. Now, if he'd complained about Fearne Cotton being given a daily slot on Radio 1, he might have found some supporters. Liz Kershaw wasn't happy at being moved from breakfasts on BBC Radio Coventry & Warwickshire. Over at the NME, Krissi Murison was given the job of managing the steadying decline as new editor.

Death Cab For Cutie had a go at Jared Leto - "he's not a real pop star, he's just a pretty boy pretending to be rock and all his fans are girls" they cried, before noticing everyone was staring at them and saying "what? What?" Panic At The Disco split, just a few days after Fall Out Boy denied they were splitting. (They were, of course.) Away from the eyeliner counter, Little Man Tate gave up the battle.

There was a panicky remodelling of Leona Lewis in a bid to get her to a second album. John McCain and his team finally apologised to Jackson Browne for using his music without asking while Phil Spector started getting letters from Charles Manson.

Gary Jarman had an emergency op to save his voice. The Smashing Pumpkins consisted of whatever Billy Corgan said they did, said Billy Corgan.

Hull ISP Karoo started disconnecting filesharers. Radio City's all-talk City Talk station got permission to erm, play music. Guy Hands was begging the banks to accept they'd never see half a billion quid they'd lent Terra Firma to buy EMI ever again - if you're a record label, taking money and giving nothing in return is known as "write off"; perhaps file sharers could say they're seeking a write-off of label investment?

One-man punchline Marilyn Manson threatened to visit journalists who gave him bad reviews. God, he's going to be so busy.

[Part of the month-by-month review from Stuck On Repeat 2009]