Monday, February 08, 2010

"Liam Gallagher is known for his caustic put-downs"

Contactmusic is delighted by the wit of Liam Gallagher. He, they remind us:

is known for his caustic put-downs

So let's prepare ourselves for an onslaught of wit as Gallagher turns his attention to Florence Welch, shall we?
Liam quipped:

Ooh, it's going to be a quip...
"I'm not having someone with ginger hair making music."

Oh, ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Oh, please, give me a moment to pull myself together.

Just in case this brilliant witticism is a little too clever for you, it's a reference to the fact that Florence Welch has red hair, and that... um...

Liam Gallagher is 36 years old.

He does actually manage to be unintentionally funny when he suggests no band has taken Oasis' place:
"People are far off being the best band in England or the best band in the world. There are some good bands out there but there's no one claiming that mantle."

Obviously, there's the humorous belief that Oasis were some sort of pinnacle of achievement in the first place, which is onyl made better by Gallagher's strange belief that the vacuum they've left behind is so huge, it means that there isn't even a best band any more; as if the very concept of being the best band has been abolished in the same way some shirt numbers get retired in sports.


James said...

"The former Oasis singer - who is known for his caustic put-downs"

Minor grammatical point, but shouldn't that read "The former Oasis singer - who, along with his tiresome brother, is known for being a handy quote-machine for lazy hacks (and you, Moyles) who can simply reel off a list of names currently in the public eye and note down his negative reaction to each, then report each one as a devastatingly witty insult worthy of Shakespeare himself, like he's some kind of tedious f***ing 'no-nonsense' salt-of-the-earth type putting the world to rights, under the soul-crushing assumption that we'd all be much better off if everyone just stopped being different and wore the same grey anoraks over Ben Sherman shirts and churned out the same plodding arse-rock until the end of f***ing time. I mean, for f***'s sake, it's like listening to Simon Cowell after he stopped bothering to try with the withering put-downs and just droned 'That was probably the worst singing I've ever heard' at every other act. Bet his new band's shit too". Probably just a typo.

There's a great photo on that article though. Is that mac something from Liam's own collection? If so, I must salute him on his business nous. He's cleverly spotted a vast untapped market, providing clothes to today's modern flasher.

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