Saturday, January 22, 2011

Gordon in the morning: Those who came before me lived through their vocations

Quite a week for Bizarre alums, really. The unlikeable Piers Morgan took over Larry King's role of fawning over celebrities unwatched on CNN, while Morgan's desk monkey Andy Coulson... well, he's had a week, too.

Coulson's time on Bizarre is best-remembered for the time he got the Daily Mirror to print a story claiming Paula Yates was having a rib removed. I suppose Gordon's team concentrate on printing made-up stories in their own newspaper rather than everyone else's.

Talking of Gordon's team, for a second day they're cutting up bits of the Q interview with Liam Gallagher. Some newspapers serialise extracts from books; The Sun thinks so little of its readers it thinks it needs to serialise extracts from magazine articles.

Today's "revelation"?

"I've got bad skin. I've got psoriasis all over my f****** body. Everywhere except for me face. And every now and again on me head. This geezer comes up to me off his t*ts, going 'I ain't seen Oasis for f****** years, f****** great', and I'm going, 'Yeah, all right'.

"He goes to his mate, 'Look Steve, he's even got cocaine in his hair'. And he pulls a bit of s*** out me hair." The unnamed man then stuck it up his nose.
I love the way the paper added the "the unnamed man" bit on the end, hinting that there might be a big reveal where it turns out to have been Nick Clegg or television's Adrian Chiles [note to self: check Adrian Chiles still on television. Check ITV still on television].

It's good news for Liam, though: a fanbase that can't tell a personal grooming problem from a class a drug might just not be able to tell Beady Eye from an interesting band.