Eddie Van Halen emerges from rehab; starts his engines

If you have a map showing the whereabouts of the rock gods, you should move the Eddie Van Halen pin from rehab and stick it in Phoenix, where he's due to do something connected with NASCAR drivers, a guitar company and Subway's sub-Quiznos subs. Unfortunately, the press release is such a mess of brand names and trademark acknowledgements we can't really make out what it's all about:

"Rock and roll, fast cars and guitars, I can't think of a better combination. Fender is proud to partner with our friends, Eddie Van Halen and PIR, for this great occasion." said Matt Janopaul, President & COO of Fender Musical Instruments Corp.

We can think of better combinations - rock and roll and guitars and no fast cars, for example. But we're sure the comination will sell lots of sandwiches.

Van Halen tries to wean himself off reunion plans

Eddie Van Halen has gone into rehab - not, you'll understand, for himself. But for all of us:

In a statement addressed to fans Thursday on Van Halen's Web site, the guitarist said he decided to seek treatment because "at the moment I do not feel that I can give you my best."

"That's why I have decided to enter a rehabilitation facility to work on myself, so that in the future I can deliver the 110 percent that I feel I owe you and want to give you."

Since Van Halen have been churning out less than forty per cent - on a good day - since about 1984, that's going to be quite a long time he'll be in there.

Victoria Newton hasn't published a card for us to send him, yet.