Sex Pistols realise you can't live off butter adverts forever

Country Life advertising character John Lydon and his old chums out of The Sex Pistols might very well be about to make a new record, warns Glen Matlock:

"The Sex Pistols? We've done our bit this year…we'll meet again in the new year and see what we want to do," he explained.

"We were not recording a new album - I think that journalists are making it up, but you can never say never," he added.

"We all got ideas between us. It's a double-edged sword if you do it not good as the original, and if you don't do it people want to know why - but it's up to us. We are the masters of our own destiny."

Unusually for someone issuing such a dire threat, there has not yet been a follow-up list of demands that must be met in order to prevent said threat being carried out.

It's not yet known if the NME has plans, should there be another record, to launch a campaign like last year's bid to get God Save The Queen back to number one, but we can only hope.

Ooh! John Lydon likes to swear!

Buttocks! Haircrack! Enormous, um, breasts or something!

Hello, we're swearing.

Tiggywinkles! Wee wee!

We've been inspired by John Lydon, who thinks that saying 'fuck' on stage is so shocking, it's worth warning newspapers well in advance when you're going to do it.

Pants! TenaLady! Alisha's Attic!

Glen Matlock - allegedly - asked him to tone it down a bit, but Lydon stamped his pretty little foot, said "snot" and refused:

"He's been saying that all this swearing should stop. I understand he's a father and doesn't want his son to have to hear foul language.

"I wrote in 'Bodies', ' Fuck this and fuck that / Fuck it all, and fuck the fuckin brat', and I don't think there's a clearer song about the pain of abortion.

"The juxtaposition of all those different psychic things in your head and all the confusion, the anger, the frustration, you have to capture in those words."

Bodies might be a strong song, although its adoption by both pro- and anti-choice campaigners suggests it's a little unclear in its message, and, yes, the language is justified by the context - but does Lydon really believe that there is no "clearer song about the pain of abortion"? What about, for example, Ani DiFranco's Lost Woman Song or Michelle Shocked's Prodigal Daughter?

Still, never mind about that: let's just focus on the swearing instead:

cooties! bulb-sachets! green-tabs!