Madonna off the rails

Back at the end of the 80s, the now-very-defunct Blitz magazine ran a picture where Madonna's head was cut in half and one side of Thatcher's stuck in its place.

It looks a little like this might have been an actual photograph rather than a photomanipulation, as Madonna really does seem to be turning into Thatcher. She even now shares a boogerman with Thatch, in the shape of Ken Livingstone:

"Will Ken Livingstone get my vote? No. The traffic in London is worse than ever now. All Red Ken wants is roadworks going on everywhere."

Yes. She called him Red Ken. Like it was 1983. I was half-expecting to hear some praise for the work of the London Residuary Body.

She doesn't say if she'd vote for the casually racist and homophobic human lampoon Boris Johnson, although we know she wouldn't. Nor would she vote for Red Ken, even if she agreed with him. What with being an American citizen and all.

The reason for all her ire at Red Ken? Besides Red Robbo and Scargill being off the scene when she needs some good socialist-kicking? Apparently it's London transport policy:

The singer, who has a London home, said traffic was worse than ever in an interview with Q magazine.

Ah. It's because transport is bad, and not because Madge has to fork out for the congestion charge, then. She also claims that the Tube isn't usable - as if she'd really love to be hopping on the underground but simply can't stand the delays. When did anyone ever see Madonna on the Tube? How would she know it's so bad?

Madonna then outlines her big idea:

"I would make it so that young musicians, aspiring musicians wouldn't have to pay the congestion charge or pay taxes."

Yes, that'd work. Never mind the fact that musicians at the start of their career will be broke, travelling by public transport and not earning and not paying taxes anyway, let's create a system where people claiming they're following one form of career path. Why should musicians be exempt and not, say, potential doctors, or nurses, or bus drivers?

And if aspiring musicians are to be left out of the taxation pot, would successful musicians therefore pay a higher rate of taxation to acknowledge the support the state has provided for them in helping them achieve success? Is Madonna happy to have her tax rate increased to pay for the plans?

Thom Yorke dons the green eye-shield

Today's Observer magazine has been guest-edited by Thom Yorke; it's a climate change special and in his introduction he suggests that his larger-than-average global footprint is a help, rather than a hindrance, in spreading the message:

At first I told Friends of the Earth that I was absolutely the wrong person to be associated with their campaign. I've based my life on touring and the rock industry is a high energy-consuming industry. But they persuaded me that that was exactly why it was a good idea for me to be involved, that they didn't want to present a holier-than-thou message.

That's true - and makes a certain degree of sense - although how far would you take that? There's a sense that this is the environmental equivalent of those times when Keith Richards tells pop stars to not take drugs, isn't it?

But, for a whiskey priest, Yorke is pretty passionate and takes well to his brief - interviewing Ken Livingstone about plans to bring bike rental to central London, for example. Sadly, he doesn't get his hands dirty with testing alternatives to bin liners.