Public Service Announcement: Stay in your homes, disconnect all electronic equipment

Scientists have warned that a dangerous new strain of half-arsed pop has been created, with a strain of X Factor makeweights crossing over into second-string reality television:

Gaz from Geordie Shore has made a record with The Risk.

The surprise? It's actually rather good.

Sorry, that should be, it'd be a surprise if it was actually rather good. It isn't. It sounds like something that Craig David might have done if he'd had a bad cold one day.

However, there is some fun to be had, watching the room-meat dancing in the background, and counting the number who are desperately trying to look like they're enjoying themselves, against those who can't even be arsed to pretend any more.