Saturday, May 29, 2004

More Toxicity

We're not sure how fresh the latest attack from Avril on Britney is, but it does seem that she still can't get through an interview without having a pop at her. because she's not Britney, do you see?

"Tons of mums come up to me and say thank you for not dressing like Britney Spears. Sometimes she just overdoes it with the facial expressions. You should dress like that for your boyfriend, not for the world.

Interesting perspective that Avril thinks you should dress up in a way that isn't "you" for a man - that's very progressive right there. And how exactly does Avril's mean and moody rebel personna square itself with being parentally-approved?

We're sure, of course, parents would rather their kids dressed like this:

Meanwhile, Lavigne also has a go at Hilary Duff, calling her a "goody goody." So, there's some fine line somewhere between being unacceptable to parents, but not too acceptable. We're so glad we're not a teenage girl having to negotiate all that...

[UPDATED August 2014 to repoint link to version of Ananova story]


Anonymous said...

Can I steal a joke from my 6 year old cousin and say that growing up as teen girl, it's obviously complicated...

Maybe not...


W. Farm said...

To be fair, there are only two reasons to like Britney Spears. The first is the Pavlovian froth that appears on the mouths of women unable to keep themselves from yowling, "they're not real, you know," every time Brit appears on TV. The second is that she's from Louisiana, the third-most ignorant yet first-most humorous and charming state in the U S of A.
Despite the Frenchy name, which should make Avril feel some sort of Franco-sisterly bond with Our Lady of Kentwood, a hamlet so infused with purity that its water is bottled and sold all over the South, M. Lavigne has taken to moralizing in a style more appropriate for upstate Alabama than Canada. I mean, "facial expressions?"
You Britishers might not realize this, but for a Canadian, this is a broadside roughly analagous to "fuck you, my friend" for a Chicagoan, or "get a dog up ya, ya poofta" to an Aussie. In other words, she's crossed the line.
Now, we all know she has sexual issues -- I mean, she's Canadian -- but despite all attempts to stop it, NAFTA has ensured a steady stream of second-rate Canadian talent relocating to the US. (It will take a generation to undo the cultural damage done by Martin Short alone.) So perhaps M. Lavigne should consider relocating. Northern Alabama awaits you, cher. A few years handling snakes should cheer you right up.
But at the very least, the mall-styling jailbait needs to get off my Looziannish belle's ass. Or she might find the Superdome -- er, the House of Blues -- er, Canal Place Mall colder than a Montreal June. (I know, you don't think that's really all that cold, but it's the metric system up there, so it's only like 15 degrees, schmears).
And yes they are too real.

Anonymous said...


Avril Lavigne has ascended to a lofty pedestal: The 22-year-old now has the most No. 1 top 40 hits this decade at five and is the No. 2 artist in the 14-year history of Nielsen BDS, behind Mariah Carey's six chart-toppers. —Chuck Taylor (

It's official - see weblink:

Simon Hayes Budgen said...

Anonymous: are you working for Lavigne's press office or is this some sort of school project your repeated cut and paste is part of?

Anonymous said...

Thanks anon, for reminding us of the disturbing toll that listening to Lavigne's music repeatedly takes on the human brain.

Jack said...

Presumably some kind of Avril Lavigne blogbot. The existence of which terrifies me.

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