Sunday, December 20, 2009

Dancing On Ice: This is the "best ever" line-up apparently

To be fair to ITV, their fairly pointless Strictly-on-Ice has struggled so badly to attract stars over the last couple of years, when they say the 2010 cast is the best ever, they're not fibbing.

Danny Jones!

Even if we told you he was in Corrie, you might struggle a bit. He was Mike Baldwin's younger grandson, the one they had to write out fairly sharpish due to his frightening similarity to a ventriloquist's dummy. Only without the abilty to deliver lines.

Kieron Richardson!

It helps with these things, if you don't know, to guess Hollyoaks. Sooner or later, you'll be right.

Peter Shilton!

The England goalie (who wasn't blind in one eye) turned goalkeeping glove magnate turned... well, nothing much, apparently.

Ruth Langsford!

"This Morning host" it says here, although clearly not one of the main ones.

Sharron Davies!

Yes, she's actually still sort-of-quite famous, and nobody's going to mention The Big Breakfast.

Emily Atack!

Because even a role in an E4 sitcom makes you stand out amongst this crowd.

Gary Lucy!

There's always a Bill in this, like Strictly always has an EastEnder.

Bobby Davro!

Currently playing second-fiddle to Mickey Rooney in Milton Keyne's panto. He'll go out in week one, anyway.

Hilary Jones!

Doctor On Ice: The 'Doctor' film they somehow didn't bother to make.

And, finally, the two vaguely connected with music:

Sinitta!

(Although now the 'occupation' part of her passport reads 'Simon Cowell's ex')

and...

Heather Mills!

Let's hope the judging doesn't go against her, or it'll be a drenching for Philip Schofield.

To be fair, Heather Mills is still kind of famous. If anyone bothers to watch, we'd be interested to know how many mentions of her cafe on Brighton seafront turn up.


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