Kylie: Young woman had sex shock

The Daily Star is regurgitating already vomit-flecked stuff from The News Of The World ("The Sun On The Sunday") about Kylie.

It's shocking. Prepare to be shocked:

Kylie Minogue's girl-next-door image shattered by sex revelations in explosive new book

There was a period when Kylie was known as SexKylie, so this is the sort of shock right up there with discovering that cheese, for all its tasty solidity, was once milk.

The Star seems aware that this is a yawning chasm in their story, so try to rationalise why this might be a shock:

The pint-sized pop star, who is well-known for her innocent girl-next-door image, is said to have been naughty between the sheets long before her highly-publicised romance with Michael Hutchence, who is said to have "corrupted" her.

The "revelation" is simply that she had sex with someone, so the Star is hoping that 'woman had sex with someone before the boyfriend she met when she was 20' is some sort of surprise. (Apart from anything, surely this is going to generate another Jason Donovan lawsuit?)

It basically all boils down to a tatty book from a tatty little man, Sean Smith, who has got a tattier little man Paolo Marcolin to "tell-all". (It's a 'two teenagers having sex at a party' story - which, a quick search of Google will reveal, is a thing that has never happened anywhere else, at any point before or after.)

And how much weight should we give to Mr Macrolin's testimony?

"We lay on the floor. It was freezing but I had enough alcohol in me not to notice. I was really enjoying myself because Kylie was so nice," Paolo added.

So Marcolin was too drunk to notice it was freezing, and yet he noticed it was freezing.

Sean Smith - who, let's not rush to judge as some sort of grubby smut peddler, perhaps a man with stained trousers and smelly fingers - appears to have some sort of justification for trying to make money and headlines out of a fairly typical thing for a teenager to have done:

"For someone so careful about her private life, Kylie can be astonishingly indiscreet. It is as if, every so often, she gets the devil in her."

Even for a screaming moral vacuum, this is disingenuous. His own tale suggests that this isn't true - let's just look back at Paolo's quote:

"My hands were wandering a bit. Out of the blue, she said, 'Do you want to go somewhere even more private?' Of course I agreed. It sounded great to me.

"She had no idea where she was going but eventually took me to the opposite side of the house. There were a few people catching taxis, so we walked round the corner to be out of sight — or so I thought."
[...]
However, the pair soon realised that they were getting frisky in full view of the other party guests and headed to a small workshop underneath the house where they allegedly began having sex.

So, given that Kylie - without, at this stage, some sort of judging role on Saturday night TV to worry about - twice moved somewhere further out of public view hardly screams of indiscretion. Sean Smith seems to be saying that simply by having someone else present to have sex with Kylie's leaving herself open to having it discussed.

Perhaps Sean hasn't noticed, but it's Paolo who is being indiscreet. It might be a bit much to claim that Kylie had the devil in her, but she certainly seems to have made room for a bit of a Judas.