Gordon in the morning: No new Amy album

Gordon's readers might have assumed, from all his talk a couple of weeks ago about "listen to Amy's new songs" that there might have been a new album on the horizon. Anyone with half a mind would have realised the chances of a new record this year - with the artist incapacitated and the old one still selling strongly in the US off the back of the Grammys - was unlikely.

But Gordon's still surprised, reporting there's not going to be an album made from scratch this year.

Madonna's purchase of a new flat gets a Bizarre treatment, with Emily Smith trumpeting this as:

New split talk: Madge buys flat

But then, as the piece concedes:

The superstar singer, 49, has won a legal fight to buy a third £3.5million apartment in the Manhattan block where she already has a huge two-storey pad.

So, if she was at breaking point, it's not as if she didn't have anywhere to go before this. And, we suspect, if she needed to book into a Travelodge for a couple of nights, it wouldn't exactly break the bank, would it?

Meanwhile, Gordon has short shrift for the Kooks, as he reads on a website Luke Pritchard's explanation of why Max Rafferty quit:

“Things got a bit much for him, I think. Not to get some fucking violin out . . . but it can be really difficult being in a band, especially when you’re like that.”

I was beginning to enjoy Luke’s honesty until he said that. Don’t give me that “it’s difficult being in a band” crap.

Millions of people would love to swap places with them.

Well... yes, they might, Gordon, but that doesn't make it any easier having an addictive personality being in one.

The Kooks split. But not enough.

Max Rafferty has left The Kooks, for the second time. The band have got a replacement - because they teach you that 'the show must go on' at stage school - but for now, we're choosing to see it as one down, three to go.