We need to talk about '11: June
Amy Winehouse played Belgrade; it ended badly. And after Gordon Smart in The Sun had promised us it was all under control.
In a strange and still unexplained episode, someone who clearly knew a lot suggested that Ronan Parke's "journey" on Britain's Got Talent might have started earlier than we had been made to believe; Cowell deployed lawyers and cops and eventually the story was denied in the way it started, with an anonymous post to justpasteit.
In other Cowell-related dark-doings, the Kaiser Chiefs claimed they'd been threatened when they tried to pull out of a Girls Aloud special. And we never really got to the truth of what happened when one of the Wanted and Alastair Campbell clashed.
Lady GaGa admitted the dollar pricing for her album was probably a fair price. Kasabian tried to blame the universe for their new songs.
Do you have a dream? Dave Davis is offering to interpret it for you.
Disappointingly, Joan Jett tried to close down a cancer benefit while Sony muttered it might be difficult to release footage to Conrad Murray's defence team.
Uncut announced plans to target U2's Glastonbury performance but security didn't want to see any conscience on display at Worthy Farm. Also at Glastonbury, David Cameron's constituency chair died in a chemical toilet and Zane Lowe upset people by saying he didn't watch Beyonce.
Who's the world's worst terrorist? Obama, according to Lupe Fiasco. Pink asked the paparazzi to leave her kid alone; the Mail reported the story, left out the request and crammed in long-lens pictures of the baby. And Paul Dacre seriously wonders why people call him an anus-head.
Kerrang celebrated thirty years of being thirteen years old as figures for NME TV showed it was lucky to pull 4,000 viewers. At least NME still exists, though, but whatever happened to Peaches Geldof's magazine?. At long last, Rupert Murdoch finally got someone to take MySpace off his hands.
The BPI decided it should be responsible for the morals of the internet.
It's hard to believe that back in June, the world was only just being introduced to Wonderland, Louis Walsh's new girlband. Back then, nobody had heard of them and now... well, now it's December. Mind you, we did enjoy Walsh telling Boyzone to split up.
New format alert: The location-aware album.
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