Tom Jones now telling Elvis anecdotes down the Job Centre

Tom "Bloody" Jones isn't a happy man. He was fully expecting to continue his judging role on The Voice - which effectively means sitting in a chair for fifteen weeks, occasionally jerking awake to say "Bob Dylan used to deliver my Ocado order in the 60s", before slumping back into a slumber. He'd even been practising trying to watch Will I Am's "antics" without allowing his face to betray the complete depth of his contempt.

But it's not to be. The BBC have decided that Sir Tom needn't bother himself this year. His place on the panel has gone to Boy George. (The now-absent Rita Ora has been replaced by Paloma Faith, which will have the same result you'd have got if Ora had spent the summer break doing a correspondence course.)

Tom isn't happy, though. The Telegraph hears his pain:

Writing on his official Facebook and Twitter pages, Sir Tom revealed he had not chosen to leave of his own accord, accusing executives of lacking basic respect.

He said: "In good faith, as part of the team, I’d put the time in my schedule to be involved in Series 5, as I’ve done for the last 4 years. I’ve supported the show and the BBC since the beginning.

"I was told yesterday, with no consultation or conversation of any kind, that I would not be returning.

Having been through plenty of transformations throughout the years, I support and admire creative change. But being informed, as a matter of duty and respect, is an important part of creative relationships.

"This sub-standard behaviour from the executives is very disappointing.

"I will always admire the courage of the performers who participate in the show, as well as all the production staff who worked tirelessly to make a great family viewing experience for the audience at home. I wish the show well."

Someone who has been part of The Voice for four years being surprised at something sub-standard happening in the production team really does suggest Tom spent most of the time sleeping, doesn't it?

Those who also entertain: Paloma Faith's snake

Apparently, appearing on a Paloma Faith CD sleeve makes you something of a big deal in the snake world:

Milk snake, Stripey Won, moved into his new home at the farm last month and is a part of the reptile enclosure, which opened to the public on Monday.

But in a past life, Stripey Won was the cover star for pop singer Paloma Faith, featuring on the CD and inside booklet of double platinum selling album A Perfect Contradiction.

She also featured on the single cover for the singer's single, Ready For The Good Life.

There are many more snakes in the music industry; most of those, however, also have legs.

You ain't no Shirley Bassey

Is there anything more likely to turn your whole body in on itself than the sight of those adverts movie companies place trying to get votes from Oscars judges?

Oh, hang on, there is. A new level of cringe:

Dear @007 Ive been waiting patiently to be able to sing the next theme.I was BORN to do it.Please don't give it to someone else again!

— Paloma Faith (@Palomafaith) February 6, 2015

I don't think they choose the Bond theme that way, Paloma.

Rule of thumb: If a medium won't work when you post 'OMG HARRY STYLES MARRY ME', it probably isn't the best place to audition for a high profile job. Except that time Mark Carney did '@georgeosborne I could so be Bank Boss have got new calculater ;)'

Paloma Faith kind-of misses the naked photo point

The myriad of difficult privacy and security issues that fall out from the hacking of the iCloud? Paloma Faith isn't that bothered:

She told The Sun on Sunday: ''I don't feel like I've ever done anything that I'm particularly ashamed of.

''I would rather they didn't see naked pictures of me, but if they did, I can honestly say I've never taken an untasteful one.''

That's a bit like being told that there are burglaries in the area, and shrugging with a "well, at least if they pinch the silver, I've had a chance to polish it first."

Also: why would you even share your thoughts on mobile phone hacking with the the News Of The World? It's like going to Russia to talk about territorial integrity.

Paloma Faith: Pop stars are dead

Pop stars? THERE ARE NO POP STARS, screams Paloma Faith:

Paloma Faith thinks David Bowie is the last great pop star.

The 'Can't Rely On You' singer reckons pop is dead because of social media and fans know too much about their idols.

She told the Daily Star newspaper: "There's no mystery or excitement about being a pop star any more.

"People know everything now, there's no stone unturned with social media."

It's not often that I feel the need to defend Madonna, but... surely Madonna? Maybe even GaGa? Or Perry? Can you really say they're not proper pop stars?

Meanwhile, a 1980s teenager writes: "yeah, we weren't motivated to know every last scrap of information about our heroes. We'd never buy magazines about them; and certainly when Look-In tried to provide information files on the stars, we'd insist our local newsagents redacting the data points in case we found out what sort of things our pop stars liked to eat or watch."

Faith hasn't quite finished:

She said: "It was brilliant that David Bowie won a BRIT Award and totally deserved, he's an incredible artist and the last of a generation."

She may have said something else, but everyone ran off to read the Kate Bush gig announcement at this point and her words were left hanging in the air.