Slight fiasco: Lupe booked for inauguration bash

Obviously, choosing an act to play a party in celebration of Obama's inauguration is a tricky business. You might wonder, though, why Washington's Hamilton Live would have plumped for Lupe Fiasco.

I mean, booking Lupe Fiasco at all seems to be an odd thing to want to do at all, but in an event celebrating a man Fiasco calls a child killer it's a bemusing booking.

Lupe started his set with a half-hour war song, and ended the set that way, too, as he was "helped" from the stage by security.

At the moment, backstage at the White House, Joe Biden is assuring Barack there won't be a repeat at the inauguration proper as "this Teddy Nugent guy I've booked is a real patriot, apparently".

Lupe Fiasco attempts some political commentary

Lupe Fiasco popped up on CBS' What's Trending show yesterday. Yes, CBS have a programme called What's Trending, which is sweet, isn't it? It's like when my Dad tried to get to grips with Teletext.

Anyway, Lupe decided to share his political insight with the world:

“To me,” Lupe began, “the biggest terrorist is Obama in the United States of America."

That Obama, then. Breathe again, Obamas elsewhere in the world. You're off the hook.

But tell us, Lupe, why do you believe that? Besides, presumably, because you've just finished ninth grade?

I’m trying to fight the terrorism that’s causing the other forms of terrorism.

Righto, Lupe.

You know the root cause of terrorists is the stuff the U.S. government allows to happen.

I don't think US foreign policy always helps in terms of ensuring the world gets on, but isn't you analysis a little over-simplistic?

The foreign policies that we have in place in different countries that inspire people to become terrorists.

You're not really sure what a foreign policy is, are you, Lupe?

To be fair, a man who starts a song with the words "I'm not a turtle" isn't ever likely to be called upon to take the fifth seat on Question Time, so perhaps we're being unfair. After all, Mr Fiasco has said he won't be using his vote any time soon:

“No, I don’t vote,” he said. “I don’t get involved in politics. It’s meaningless. If I’m going to say I stand behind this person and write on a piece of paper that says, ‘Yeah, I stand for this person,’ then I have to take responsibility for everything he does cause that’s just who I am as a human being. So politicians aren’t going to do that because I don’t want you to bomb some village in the middle of nowhere.”

So you don't vote for, say, your local mayor because if you did, somehow you'd be bombing Afghanistan?

Unfortunately, Lupe's interview seems to have ended before he could be asked, for example, whether the US intervention in Libya is justified, or if he understands that voting is a process in which you choose a candidate who is the best fit for you, and you're unlikely to ever find someone who you agree with 100%. Or that if you don't vote at all, you're never going to see your voice and opinions reflected in government because you've chosen to opt out. But, hey, I bet the kids who skipped civics class to smoke were impressed.

Lupe Fiasco is very, very upset

Who knew it was so easy to insult Lupe Fiasco? All it takes is a little bit of bittorrentage:

"If you come across it and you like it and keep it to yourself that's all cool with me but to make it where as other people are able to download it in a public forum is honestly an insult to me. Especially because of how much I love you guys. That shit is kinda like a slap in the face."

Like a slap in the face, but with the advantage that you don't have to get within an extended arm's distance of him. But he's only so insulted because he loves you so much. Yes, you. And what do you do? You slap him in the face.

Actually, it's not really you at all. Lupe believes in the record label myths:

My entire first album leaked and possibly cost me from going platinum my first time out as the final estimates of how many people actually downloaded that album illegally was well over half a million."

The final estimates? You mean a guess? And, yes, it's possible it cost you some sales - after all, there are some artists who won't thrive in a world where you can try before you buy. But it didn't cost you half a million sales, Lupe. You're just making yourself look even more foolish.

Glastonbloggy: A quick scamper

BBDO say their joke is a repeat, but then Glastonbury is about the classics, isn't it?

Gowherehiphop catches Lupe Fiasco's slightly-more-political-than-Borrell-at-Hyde-Park speech:

“During his set at the Glastonbury Festival in the U.K. last night, rapper Lupe Fiasco spoke out about “tyrannical world leaders”, clumping Zimbabwe’s longtime dictator and the American president in the same category “Fuck Robert Mugabe, Fuck George Bush,” he said. Fuck politics, democrats, socialists, the Labor party. Music’s what it’s all about.”

David Cameron, we're given to understand, has already welcomed this endorsement of the Conservatives.

John Demetriou takes the Mail to task for its less-than-enthusiastic embrace of the festival:

Let’s move past several paragraphs of negativity and nastiness and get to something else: “With a captive audience, traders ramped up their charges…you could buy a sausage sandwich if you had £6 to spare and a mocha to wash that down for £3.”

You can just hear the selfish old bitter cunts now, as they read this story pretending not to look at the pictures of fruity looking girls swanning by: “ooooooh, how much? hooowww much? And I’m going to have to pay for this!”

The reader's responses are also explored:

Chris said: “How can the Fire Authority allow people to pitch tents so close to one another? This site is a fire disaster waiting to happen.”

Yeeeeah, close it dooowwn, now. Nuurrgh.

What an absolute spanner. What the hell has pitching tents close together in a wet and damp environment got to do with fire hazards, and if there were fire hazards, don’t you think this would have been looked into?

It's a good point, though - we're betting none of those tents have got fire escapes, much less clear signage pointing out the emergency exits. Something must be done.

[Part of the Glastonbury Weekend]

Lupe has had enough

Frankly, when I heard the news, I wasn't that surprised:

"Have you heard? Lupe's getting out of the business."

"Well", I said, "he's had a fair try at it, but he's never really made it through to one of the all-time-greats. He's always been more a Captain Ric than a Captain Crunch."

"What are you talking about?"

"Loopy, the Kellogg's Honey Nut Loops Bee. Kelloggs Honey Nut Loops, let's loop together..."

"No, you idiot. Not Loopy, Lupe. L-U-P-E. Lupe Fiasco. He's had enough of the music industry and plans to quit next year."

"Oh. So there's no need for Crackle out of Snap, Crackle and Pop to put in a CV?"

"Not unless they're wanting to become a rapper, no."

"Pity. Crackle's been keen to launch a solo career ever since Coco The Monkey started dating both of the Bisto kids."

"No, this has nothing to do with cereal mascots. This is huge - Lupe Fiasco. Quitting music."

"Is he really quitting, though? Or is this like Jay-Z or Eminem, where they run out of things to say in interviews because, frankly, their lives get a little too comfy, and a little too dull, and threatening retirement is the only thing they can think of it liven matters up?"

"Hang about... yes, he does seem to have rather a full list of planned collaborations down for a man about to hang up his earphones. So he's probably not serious about it, no."

"Oh."

"So, then... has Crackle thought of sounding out PopTarts?"

Music brave as Fiasco quits

Enjoy the next Lupe Fiasco album - well, you know what we mean - as it's to be his last:

"I have one more album in me and then I'm out. I've been doing this music hustle for eights years and have more things I still want to do.

"There are other ways besides putting out an album that allow me to channel my creative energy and I'm writing a book about a window washer. I will have more than enough to keep me busy."

We presume he means his book is going to be about a windowcleaner rather than insight into the life of a windscreen wiper. Let's hope he'll call it "If I don't see you through the week, I'll see you through a window".

We're keen to find out what the plot of this window cleaning novel will be - we're betting the woman at 19, Inkerman Street will loom large. Or if not her, the hip-hop equivalent.