Not Forgot-Ten: February 2010

Jack White took on the American Air Force for not asking before the service used a tune in a recruitment ad. Soundscan was accused by Cheap Trick of flogging data it shouldn't have to major labels to let them undermine self-released stuff. Google wiped a swathe of music blogs off the internet but, obviously, not in an evil way. Perhaps that might satisfy Kasabian, who decided that the internet has ruined music.

Noel Gallagher, of Chalfont St Giles, applied for planning permission to build a gazebo of some sort.

Warners got angry that having music paid for by advertising didn't treat the "artists" with "respect". Not like churning out best ofs and dumping acts who don't recoup does. Talking of respect, EMI's Guy Hands doesn't honor his mother and father with visits, as that might affect his tax status. Legally, he's a tax avoider. And if you can't remember the difference, tax dodgers don't pay their tax illegally, tax avoiders just don't pay tax unethically.

Courtney Love was invited to the Oxford Union to share her... well, for some reason. Status Quo went to the Palace to pick up their OBEs and beamed from ear-to-royalist-forelocktugging-ear. The BPI invited Peter Kay to host the Brits, with the expected results.

Ministry Of Sound might be turned into flats and EMI suggested they might flog off Abbey Road.

Feargal Sharkey stomped his foot after a signed piece on the Culture Show had a different point of view to himself. And by "himself" these days, Sharkey tends to mean the whole of UK Music.

Elton John tried to make a subtle point about what Jesus taught us, but it ended up being reported as saying Jesus was gay.

Although the BBC Trust announced that it didn't think 6Music should close, the network wasn't out the woods yet, as it became clear management were going to close them anyway. Over on commercial radio, Akon launched a regular show on Capital by axing his regular show on Capital.

A bad case of overheating knocked Spotify off the internet for a while.

Billy Bragg staged a protest outside the offices of RBS while one of JLS got into trouble in a branch of Currys. Kittie wished people would stop treating them like they were teenagers.

Deciding that doing an interview with Playboy wasn't douchey enough, John Mayer took the opportunity to announce that his penis was a white supremacist. Having made a Canadian court rearrange all its dates, Noel Gallagher decided to not turn up at his attacker's hearing after all.

Q fell behind Mojo while This Is Fake DIY went paperstyle.

Revitalised: Buggles. Returning: Dubstar.

This month, Lady GaGa abandoned her water dress for a tribute to McQueen.