Guy Hands: A charming man

Having screwed up EMI, loaded it with debt and sent it churning towards oblivion, you're unlikely to see Guy Hands outside Abbey Road studios anytime soon.

It turns out he's so mean, to avoid paying tax he won't even go and see his family:

Guy Hands, who moved from Kent to Guernsey last April in protest at higher income and capital gains tax rates, says he has "never visited" his school age children since he left the country. They have remained with his wife at their former family home in Kent and they now have to travel to Guernsey to see him.

Neither has he visited his mother and father – and wouldn't unless there was a family crisis: "I do not visit my parents in the United Kingdom and would not do so except in an emergency."

You wonder what would constitute an emergency large enough to shake Hands into a trip to the UK? Because, clearly, family ties are so much less important than keeping as much money as you possibly can.

Hands, by the way, is boasting about how much of a selfish moneygrubber he is - he's using this example of his extreme selfishness as an argument to try and stop Citigroup being allowed to hold the Terra Firma court case in London:

In a personal statement lodged in New York's southern district court Hands says he faces a top tax rate of 64% on earnings from employment from April, plus 18% CGT. He says he has been an "outspoken" critic of UK tax levels and fears that the Revenue will be watching him closely to ensure he does nothing that could threaten his move to obtain non-resident tax status.

Hands hasn't actually been able to explain why a country that has given him so much should be denied tax revenue that everyone else has to pay, nor why his meanness should be a determining factor in where a court case is held.

How would it be if someone facing court tried to argue the hearing shouldn't be held in, say, Liverpool because he doesn't fancy stumping up for the train fare?

Still, on the bright side, Hands, if you do have to come to the UK to fight your case, you might be able to pop in and see your parents. If they'll open the door to you. Not that they wouldn't want to, but they might be trying to save the cost of wear and tear on the hinges.