Saturday, August 15, 2015
It's easy to forget when watching Miley Cyrus trudging through tropes that were probably best left alone just what a horrible childhood she had.
She reminds us in Marie Claire this month:
Covering the September issue of Marie Claire, the former Disney star opened up to the magazine about how she came to question her physical appearance after years of being "told for so long what a girl is supposed to be from being on that show."I'm presuming here she meant that she had massive tantrums, rather than webbed feet. I think. Although if Disney had decided she should have webbed feet, you can bet that excess skin would have been grafted on pretty swiftly.
"From the time I was 11, it was, 'You're a pop star! That means you have to be blonde, and you have to have long hair, and you have to put on some glittery tight thing,' " she said. "Meanwhile, I'm this fragile little girl playing a 16-year-old in a wig and a ton of makeup. It was like Toddlers & Tiaras. I had f—ing flippers."
Cyrus admitted that she began to develop body-image issues from how she was portrayed falsely on the Disney Channel series, telling the magazine, "I was made to look like someone that I wasn't, which probably caused some body dysmorphia because I had been made pretty every day for so long, and then when I wasn't on that show, it was like, 'Who the f— am I?' "So, having felt this weight, Miley's not going to play along with those rules:
She added, "When you look at retouched, perfect photos, you feel like shit. They lighten black girls' skin. They smooth out wrinkles. Even when I get stuck on Instagram wondering, 'Why don't I look like that?' it's a total bummer. It's crazy what people have decided we're all supposed to be."
Despite societal pressure, the pop singer told Marie Claire she won't be conforming to traditional beauty standards.Which is both a wonderful sentiment, and also sort-of hard to square with the announcement last week that Cyrus has signed on for a second run of promotional work with Estee Lauder's MAC cosmetics brand.
"I'm probably never going to be the face of a traditional beauty company unless they want a weed-smoking, liberal-ass freak," she said. "But my dream was never to sell lip gloss. My dream is to save the world."
Coming shortly from Nada Surf is an album which records their March 2014 Seattle gig. They're thrown us a bone in the shape of this track:
Tom "Bloody" Jones isn't a happy man. He was fully expecting to continue his judging role on The Voice - which effectively means sitting in a chair for fifteen weeks, occasionally jerking awake to say "Bob Dylan used to deliver my Ocado order in the 60s", before slumping back into a slumber. He'd even been practising trying to watch Will I Am's "antics" without allowing his face to betray the complete depth of his contempt.
But it's not to be. The BBC have decided that Sir Tom needn't bother himself this year. His place on the panel has gone to Boy George. (The now-absent Rita Ora has been replaced by Paloma Faith, which will have the same result you'd have got if Ora had spent the summer break doing a correspondence course.)
Tom isn't happy, though. The Telegraph hears his pain:
Writing on his official Facebook and Twitter pages, Sir Tom revealed he had not chosen to leave of his own accord, accusing executives of lacking basic respect.Someone who has been part of The Voice for four years being surprised at something sub-standard happening in the production team really does suggest Tom spent most of the time sleeping, doesn't it?
He said: "In good faith, as part of the team, I’d put the time in my schedule to be involved in Series 5, as I’ve done for the last 4 years. I’ve supported the show and the BBC since the beginning.
"I was told yesterday, with no consultation or conversation of any kind, that I would not be returning.
Having been through plenty of transformations throughout the years, I support and admire creative change. But being informed, as a matter of duty and respect, is an important part of creative relationships.
"This sub-standard behaviour from the executives is very disappointing.
"I will always admire the courage of the performers who participate in the show, as well as all the production staff who worked tirelessly to make a great family viewing experience for the audience at home. I wish the show well."
We have now reached the point in human history where people are writing nostalgia pieces about Jessica Simpson:
Get ready to throw it way, way back. In the early '00s, Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson were a total power couple and gave us all of our relationship goals.Way, way back? I've got jars of Miracle Whip in the cupboard that predate Jessica Simpson.
Can it really be not only long enough to justify the looking back, but also the development of such rose tinted spectacles for the look back?
More from No Rock on jessica simpson
Wednesday, August 12, 2015
The Britannia Music Club - Buy CDs for almost nothing, and then be beholden to buy crappier CDs at full price forever more - gave up the ghost in the UK back in 2007. Astonishingly, its US equivalent, Columbia House, has been battling on in the face of the internet. "Has" is the operative word, though, as it's finally sunk under the weight of its USD63million debt.
Knowing how tenacious these services were pursuing hapless members for their quota of coins were, you'd really hope that the creditors of Columbia House will pursue the company beyond the grave.
Sunday, August 09, 2015
There's a really splendid piece by Simon Price at The Quietus which considers Rocky Horror in the round. I'm not totally convinced - I think it's as much 'exotic package holiday in other people's identity' as 'first swim' - but Price's case is strong nevertheless:
Rocky Horror indubitably provides a 'safe space', an adult creche where transgressive behaviour and cross-dressing are accepted, nay, encouraged. Rocky Horror is a set of stabilisers on your sex bike, a pair of water wings for your first swim in the sea of depravity. But is that such a terrible thing?
As we enter The Summer Without The NME, here's the most-read NME-related stories ever:
1. NME Awards shortlist 
2. Russell Brand outgunned by Monkeys at NME Awards 
3. The NME points fingers at file-sharing services 
4. Conor McNicholas relaunches NME; says Coldplay sound like The Stone Roses 
5. Arctic Monkeys win all the prizes [could be any year; this is 2008]
6. NME Awards nominations 
7. That time they added McCartney to a prize when he turned up 
8. NME Awards virtually a rerun of last year's 
9. NME makesover again 
10. Kerrang overtakes NME. Again.
These were this week's most interesting new releases:
Astrid Williamson - We Go To Dream
Download We Go To Dream
The Strands - The Magical World Of...
Download Magical World Of...
More from No Rock on this week just gone