No Rock And Roll Fun

LESS EUROVISION, MORE JEUX SANS FRONTIERES: Oh, great. As if the news that Popstars this time round is going to feature two bands to clog the charts up for all eternity, they're now planning on having one of those 'champion of champion' style shows, World Idol, whereby the winners of each nation's Pop Idol will go head to head in some ghastly reconstruction of International Superstars. But without the squat thrusts. This means that the blobbily-tongued Will Young, the world's least gay homo, will be representing You on a global stage; representing you just as his built-on-sand career at home is starting to give out like a B-reg Honda that had somehow been asked to compete in the Monaco Grand Prix. What makes it worse is that the early reports are suggesting this glittery world event will be UK versus Poland, South Africa, Germany and France - which, if you bet without France (who can probably be relied upon to enter a fourteen year old girl in a push-up bra and hotpants singing about being screwed by the local undertaker), is pretty much a line-up of the countries with the worst pop music reputations in the world. Great.