NEWS OF LITTLE OR NO INTEREST TO ANYONE: Fischerspooner are "almost" ready with their second album. Funnily enough, we're almost interested. Warren Spooner (the back half, then, of the pantomime horse) reckons "We don't want an album that goes pop song to pop song. This will be an album with themes that flow from one to another. Pink Floyd is a reference, but it's not as down and introspective, though it takes you on a journey. It's the record I always wanted to make as a kid, something that feels substantial." Unless you're the sort of kid who wears a bow tie and calls your father's father Grandpapa, you don't want to make a substantial album - anymore than a kid would want to write a story which rivals A Tale of Two Cities in scope and themes. Give a kid a Casio and a pile of tapes, he won't give you The Wall, he'll give you The Chicken Song, only with a few extra cuss-words and a chorus that uses the imagery of the willy to its full potential. Still, it's interesting to see after the world gave the cold shoulder to their attempts to make pop - something they clearly don't understand - the no-ring circus has moved on to trying something else. Warren, thank you for your interest in the music industry. We have kept your details on file in case The Pet Shop Boys position ever does become vacant.