LOCAL COPS ON A GLOBAL STAGE: We loved that Scotland on Sunday thought to ask the Lothian & Borders Police if they were going to raid the MTV European Music Awards what with all the drugs and so on, but we liked deputy chief constable Tom Wood's response, too: ""The law is no different for them as it is for anyone else. Just because they are from Hollywood doesn’t make any difference whatsoever. We will police accordingly but I’m not going to discuss any detail of operational plans that we have. Our job and our role is to make the event go smoothly just like Hogmanay and the Tall Ships events go smoothly." There's just so much that's brilliant there - from the sniffy implication that 'we're not impressed up here with you emimeminems and your kelly minogues, we've had the tall ships' to the confusion that the MTV people are coming from Hollywood - it's MTV Europe, Tom. They come from Camden. Although, admittedly, Camden is more rotten with drugs than LA is, so I guess he was just trying not to frighten anyone.