Saturday, March 13, 2004

WHAT PART OF THE LEGAL PROCESS IS IT THEY MISS?: Is it something about being a musician that causes them to have a shift in their left-brain/right-brain functions so that when they're found guilty of misbehaving, they think that it's clearing their names? Cheryl Tweedy, of course, came out of her conviction for viciously punching the crap out of a toilet attendant like she'd just saved Calais for a grateful nation; Jack White this week issued a statement which - had you not known he'd pleaded guilty to the attack on Jason Von Bondie - might have lead you to think he'd left the court an innocent man. Now, Wes Scantlin has decided he's been exonerated in Ohio, despite pleading no contest to a charge of disorderly conduct in a plea-bargain deal:

"I was innocent from the get-go, but, you know, they wanted to make an example out of something or someone, so they picked me, and, you know, there ya go, man. I got arrested for nothing, and it was publicized all over the freakin' planet Earth, and I really didn't do anything wrong to anybody, really. I said I was sorry probably 10 times."

But, Wes, if you're innocent, and were "arrested for nothing", then why did you not stand up in court and declare your innocence? Isn't it odd for an innocent man to cop for something they didn't do?

Oh, and on the not doing anything wrong to anybody... you might want to ring round the people who'd paid their hard-earneds to come see you only for you to clatter onto the stage like a drunken elephant, hurl insults at them and tell them they weren't getting the show they'd paid upfront for. It might take more than a probable ten apologies to clear that up.


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