No Rock And Roll Fun

THE BALANCE OF NEIGHBOURS ACTORS WITH RECORD CONTRACTS HAS BEEN RESTORED: As Holly Vallance returns to "acting", leaving music to fend for itself, Natalie Imbruglia returns with a new record deal. She's signed to some new BMG imprint, who think they know where (other BMG imprint) RCA went wrong with her - trying to make her pop when "Nat's really a rock chick" - i.e. she's had sex with Lenny Kravitz, on which basis Victoria Beckham is a Premiership footballer. Seriously, though, we're pleased that Natalie's been rescued from the limbo of doing poor L'Oreal adverts - we always thought she was worth more than that, at least.

This also gives an excuse to mention the fulmination against in-jokes in Neighbours, with Billy bemoaning characters making jokes about Check 1-2 - "something which shouldn't exist in the Erinsborough dimension" (or, indeed, anywhere) and "one that almost made me consider hanging myself, [...] when Toadie said that Nina could be "the next Kylie".