No Rock And Roll Fun

OCTOBER RECOVERED: Nearly a quarter of a century ago, Bono - who back then wasn't BONO - had been making notes and plans for the second U2 album. He stuck all this ideas in a suitcase, and was distraught when the case got stolen. There has been some suggestion the theft was an act of a music lover from the future, who had stolen a time machine in order to try and save the world from the Zoo TV experience and the other outcomes of a famous Bono. He failed, though, because U2 patched together the missing ideas on the fly, while they were in the studio - although it wasn't a happy experience, they clearly got the taste for knocking together any old shit as it occured to them, as it would form the basis for most of their work after 1990.

Now, though, Bono has had the suitcase returned to him. Supposedly the case turned up in a basement some years ago, but we all know the truth: it had been dropped as the time traveller passed 2004 on his way back to see if his actions had managed to stop Bono from becoming head of the United Nations in 2017. The disappointed time traveller is believed to have said, or will way, "well, if I've had no luck there, I'm going back to 1981 and see if I can't head off that Beatles reunion, then..."

We'd love to have been there when Bono opens the case, discovering his original idea for October had been a concept album about singing animals. Or something.