The sound of a hollow drum

Not that we believe the "scoop" for a moment - after all, it's in today's Daily Star, which leads on the claim that "250,000 of us could have died" which is just alarmist bollocky lies - but they reckon that Robbie Williams has been offered a million quid to be the subject of what we now have to call "an Osbournes-style documentary." I cannot start to describe how much I don't want to see Williams' everyday life, but the phrase "I'd rather have ricin dripped into my eyeballs" may give you a flavour.