YOU MAY WANT TO GET A PEN AND PAPER FOR THIS ONE, IT'S A LITTLE BIT LIKE ROCK FAMILY TREES: But how thrilling to have a first mention of Danny La Rue on No Rock - it's that sort of a day, isn't it; they had a clip from Terry and June on the business news on 'Today' this morning. Anyway, you'll recall Liberace, of course, the gay-as-a-Bacardi-Breezer pianist who sued the Daily Mirror's Cassandra for suggesting he wasn't totally straight (yes, yes, gossip so old even Popbitch would roll its eyes); his lover Scott Thorson claims that Liberace introduced him to Michael Jackson, with whom he indulged in a passionate affair, climaxing with an hour of passionate lovemaking on Danny LaRue's bed. He also reckons they did it in Lord Montague's house; he, of course, was the chap who used to pop up in adverts for his collection of classic cars held there. "Who knows? You may even see Lord Montague" ended the ad's voiceover, although "Who knows? You may even see Liberace's other half shagging the ass of Michael Jackson" would have probably been more effective in bringing in the punters - it would have had Beaulieu stomping all over the bloody Lions of Longleat. Anyway, you might be wondering what Thorson is after ("why he's coming forward now.") Apparently, its not that he's hoping he can carve a niche for himself on the chat show circuit - we'd bet he'd cut you dead if you so much as hinted he wanted a book deal - but in case he can be of some use to the prosecution case in Jackson's current trials. (He saw Michael reading some magazines with 'young boys' in, apparently, although to someone hanging out with Liberace, Lord Montague and Danny LaRue, anyone under about forty is going to look positively schoolboyish). We're guessing from this that Jacko didn't return some calls back in the 80s. If there's a word of truth in any of it.