No Rock And Roll Fun

THE STORY OF O: We've always been impressed by Australian radio, which has seemed to us to be a pretty open-minded and willing to take risks. Admittedly, this has been filtered through stuff sent to us taped from Triple JJJ by the wonderful Emma W, and that bonus CD you got with some editions of the Go Betweens best of. But it seems that, back in the mainstream, it's every bit as pisspoor and poorly run as British or American stations. A band called Frenzal Rhomb have been finding this out the hard way.

Last weekend, Frenzal were playing a festival in Darwin. Things were running behind schedule, and, pissed off to discover that some minor celeb Jackie O, who hosts a pop show on the Austereo network., wanted to eat further into their time by making some sort of speech, decided to play over her. The effect, for readers in the UK, would be like The Libertines trying to drown out Sarah Kennedy. And that would have been the end of it, had Jackie O not thrown a hissy, demanding the band apologise. On her radio show. Following threats to "bury the band", Frenzal Rhomb shuffled into her studio. It didn't go quite the way O might have hoped, as the band decided not to just roll over:

J: Okay, now for a start, I'd just like to say, Jackie - at the aftershow party at the Discovery, were you (in background Lindsay says, "During the show"), during the show, were you aware that one of your security guards threatened our guitar tech with the threat of violence - as you're doing now Kyle, "it would have been on for young and old" as you say.
K: Yeah, yep.
J: Did you know about that?
O: Yeah.
J: That security guard came up and threatened us with actual violence? Do you endorse that?
O: What, what was...
K: Yes, well I do.
J: You do? You endorse that? You would have come and punched on because we said something about Popstars and Australian Idol?
Kyle and Jackie O: No!
O: It wasn't about Popstars and Australian Idol.
J: Because you felt that somehow we'd offended you, or not given you enough time to speak up. You were nine hours late for your show...
O: Well fuck mate, at least give me a chance to say something. Like, it's so rude to just come in and say fuck you, fuck Jackie O and play the guitar over me. I was only going to talk for like, ten seconds, seriously.
J: If we're going to talk about rudeness, can you please just explain why your people are ringing up our record company telling us you're going to bury our band...
O: We're not going to bury your band...
J: And never getting played on Austereo again?
O: But yeah, probably won't get played.
J: (laughing in exasperaton) It never did get played!
O: It got played on Triple M.
K: That's because it was pretty much shit.
J: It got played at bloody midnight so they could fulfil their Australian content, it's bullshit.
K: Mate you are just so bitter, you may as well just take a new career path.
J: I'm not...(laughing). Okay...
K: You're sad, see you later, goodbye. (hangs up) Man, what a cock. Sorry everyone, we've got to go to the hot thirty countdown now.

You can hear the interview in full via Bombshell [MP3 Download]

What particularly sucks about this isn't just the uppity jackie O electing to never play the band again, which, as Frenzal Rhomb point out, is something she'd never quite got round to doing anyway. More, it's the royal way she used threats to get them on the air to try and wring out an apology - using the airwaves to fight a very personal battle - and then, when she discovered she'd been outclassed by a superior intellect, doubling the hissy to insist on the banning of the band not just from her own network, but also other stations in the family. It's the sort of behaviour you'd expect from a six year-old, not a serious broadcaster. So, not that surprising, then.

Thanks to Nick B of Lets All Turn On